1 year Photo shoot!!New pics added 12/2/09

T.J.'S BED is comfy!

I don't wanna wear the santa, but I'll eat it!

Above begins her basic one year photo shoot!

This was Macy last Christmas when Justin first got her...

Every day or every year?

Spring of 09'

Hi

Above you see a picture of my mom, which you may have seen before.... My mom has been my earthly rock since before I can recall. She is funny, strong, stubborn, fun, loving, wonderful talented and much more. She has battled cancer 3 times and by God's grace is now in remission. I am thankful to all of you who have prayed for her, and who still are!

I know the Bible says God alone is our rock, and this is so true, but I think sometimes he sends earthly things and people so that we can have physical blessings to give us a small glimpse of his reflection. not a perfect one, but a real one. I'm so thankful that God has spared my mom from cancer not once, but multiple times. Her life is so connected to mine, and mine so connected to hers that it is sometimes scary. I am still learning through all this that God alone is my source. I'm not saying I'm the perfect example of how to give thanks far from it. I am also not saying we have the model relationship either, in many ways we are different, in many ways we are the same. I would like to say I have not taken her for granted but I have. I often live in a world of black and white, hot or cold and place unrealistic expectations on the people I love most. I am thankful for the time God continues to give me with mom, and I pray I'll never forget how blessed I am for every day she is on this earth. You truly never grasp the value of a person, until you are confronted with the painful thought of a life without them.

I know tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and of course I will be giving thanks for so many things, but I know as a christian, That real Thanks giving isn't a yearly occurrence, but rather a year round practice. For example, every Thursday my friend Molly has what she calls Thankful Thursday on her blog, and I know others do as well. I would love to be able to tell you that I've been thankful, or that I exhibited thankfulness every day this year so far, but I have not. I was not always thankful last August and through October as I watched my mom so sick. I was not thankful as we begin the journey again last June. I will say though that while daily Thanksgiving is an odd concept for some it is something that has been instilled in me, as though it were second nature, and with God's help, I strive to be one who is a regular Thanksgiver!!! Ps. 116:12 "How can I repay the Lord for all his goodness to me?" The answer is: I cant, however I can live my life in a way that is a living sacrifice to God, in the good times and bad. I can choose to get up when I fail him. I began this post talking about my mom, because she has provided me with the example that Thankfulness isn't a time you set aside to attend every year, but it flows out of the heart on a regular basis! Mom if you read this thank you and I love you!

HOPE THIS LINK MINSTERS TO YOU!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvnTtPdN7W0

Please watch this! I'll come back soon!

New, but Old Prayer

Hi,

It has been a good week for me. I know I said I would post about who Lottie Moon is, but I have other things on my mind. Ps 139:23-24http://www.biblegateway.com/ HCSV. Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my concerns."
See if there is any offensive way in me; lead me in the everlasting way. "

This has become my prayer lately. It seems to convey the condition of my soul right now. I'm going to approach these verse in a different way than I normally would. Lately, I have been craving real intimacy. I know that sounds a little new age I guess but read on. If we are honest, we all realize that our heart's desire is to connect. I've been having these longings that I cannot really articulate. I have tried to ignore it, but I cannot. I've tried to stuff it with food, friendships, and whatever, but the longings still remain. The truth is I desire to be known. I'm terrified of connecting, but it is the very thing I crave. I'm terrified of people knowing the yucky stuff inside me. The anger the pride, the envy, the shame. Some people say they don't need to connect with God or with others, but I beg to differ. I think you need look know further than the number of Facebook accounts or Myspace accounts there are. and yes I have one too. What's my point, people are looking for connection every where Christian or not. The verse above again remind me that God knows me, totally completely. He knows the things that make me tick. He knows my sin. He knows my dreams. He knows my heart hunger as I call it. He is not surprised. He gave us the desire to connect in relationship with him and others. He provided the bridge in Jesus Christ to make this possible. So my new prayer is not a new one, but it is new for me. Knowing that God can and does know my heart, should do a couple of things. It should be a motivator for repentance. It should provide a great desire to know the Lord and point others to the one worthy of being known! So like the woman at the well, I'm relieved that Jesus knows me, and still purses me! So while it scares me the thought of my heart being searched and my concerns to be tested, it brings freedom! What are you thoughts? Do you relate?

All for Missions event!- Who the Heck is Lottie Moon?

Everyone loved this gift bag hand painted by my mom! Isn't she talented?!

This year a large bakery was added to raise funds.

Normally I'm BIG on putting up Christmas trees until after Thanksgiving, but it is a Christmas missions auction.

My Mom's Hand painted gift bags for our churches Lottie Moon Christmas Missions Auction. All money goes to Southern Baptists missions program. I'll post more about who Lottie Moon is later.... She was a woman who had a heart for sharing the gospel, and challeged southern Baptists in international mission efforts. I have a cold right so this will be a quick post.

Truly Blessed!

Hi bloggers:

Hope all is well your way! I am enjoying your blogs! I have many things I could blog about today, it is hard to choose which ones to cover in this post. Thank you for those who have lifted me in prayer, it is a joy to see the faithfulness of God daily. As Thanksgiving draws near in a national sense, I'm reminded of how thankful I am for so many blessings in my life. The greatest of those blessings is the Salvation God provided for me through his Son Jesus Christ! I found myself overwhelmed today by the fact that God offered his perfect Holy Son in my place on the cross. He shed his blood, even to death, that I might taste and live in the wonder and joy of being forgiven by God! www.crosswalk.com Romans 4:7-8 Blessed are they whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered.
Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord will never count against him. I am reminded today that we who are covered by the Holy blood of Christ are truly blessed beyond grasp, If you are standing in a right relationship with God, then it is putting it ever so mildly to say we are blessed! I have done nothing to deserve such blessing, but God gladly offers it to me because He is God, and He loves me! He offers you the same! Romans 4:21 .
"being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised". As Christians we can rest upon the promise that God's grace is enough to pay for and remove our sin. In the same way, that Abraham was fully convinced that God would give him a son to fulfill the promise, even though from the human point of view it was impossible. Christ has the power and authority to forgive us, and give us the eternal life He has promised! My pastor said once that if God never offered us another blessing, than our Salvation is enough! What a wonderful reality this is, if only our lives reflected it. Romans: 5:1 "Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ is the only path to forgiveness and right standing with God. He invites us to trust him through a step of faith. God offers us the gift of Salvation as well as faith. If we know the gift of salvation, we are truly blessed, and we can celebrate and declare the gift we have, and invite others to embrace the gift too of both forgiveness and faith. I'm so thankful that Christ in amazing love and grace, has given me victory in this life, and the promise of everlasting life to come! Thanks for sharing in my joy, I know many of you know personally of this blessing, and can write about it in regard to your own lives!

The love of two brothers!

My cousin Brady who is 3 spent the night with us last night, and then later today his dad brought over his little brother Jackson who is 6 months, These boys have such love and affection for each other now, and it is the most tender thing to witness! I pray on a regular basis that these boys will have a close relationship with each other throughout their lives. It would bring such joy to me, as I know how difficult sibling relationships can over time become, as age and life begin to take a toll. Enjoy these pictures of "Brotherly Love"

BUCKET LIST

Bucket List
Hit forward and place an X by all the things you've done and remove theXfrom the ones you have not, and send it to your friends (including me).This is for your Entire Life! ( ) Shot a gun() Gone on a blind date( ) Skipped school() Watched someone die( ) Been to Canada( ) Been to Alaska( ) Been to Cuba( ) Been to Europe( ) Been to Las Vegas
() Been to Mexico
(X) Been to Florida() Been on a plane ( ) Been on a Cruise Ship
( ) Served on a Jury(x) Been lost (both literally and figuratively)
() Been on the opposite side of the country
() want to Gone to Washington,DC
(X) Swam in the Ocean(X) Cried yourself to sleep
( x ) Played Cops and Robbers
(X) Played Cowboys and Indians(X) Recently colored with crayons
() Sang Karaoke (not yet..)
(X) Paid for a meal with coins only
() Made prank phone calls
() Laughed until some beverage came out of your nose() Caught a snowflake on your tongue( ) Danced in the rain(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus() Been kissed under the mistletoe() Watched the sunrise with someone(X) Blown bubbles( ) Gone ice skating() Gone skiing () Camped out under the stars(X ) Seen something so beautiful that it took your breath away() Are or have been married
() Have children (x sorta ) Have a pet
( ) Been skinny dipping outdoors(X) Been fishing(X) Been boating()Been water skiing
(X) Laughed so hard you wet your pants - you have no idea(X) Been hiking() Been camping in a trailer/RV
( ) Flown in a small 4-seater airplane( ) Flown in a glider ( ) Been flying in a helicoptor( ) Been flying in a hot air balloon( ) Been bunge-jumping
( Gone to a drive-in movie (X) Done something that should have killed you(X) Done something that you will regret for the rest of your life ( ) Been to Africa(X) Ever eaten just cookies for dinner
() Ever been on TV –
( ) Ever steal any traffic signs() Ever been in a car accident
Have a nickname? T` TeejMother's name? Madeline Favorite drink? Iced Tea or Cherry coke(X) Body piercing? Not now( ) Tattoos? How much do you love your job? On a scale 1 (low) to 10 (high) 10!!! does it count as a job, if you don't get paid.
Do you drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle?
Favorite number? 29, 18,Favorite movie? The latest is the Propasal Favorite holiday? EasterFavorite dessert? Mumzie's yummy choclate cake!Where do you see yourself in 10 years? I hope Jesus comes before thenFurthest place you will send this message? Don't knowWho will respond to this the fastest? ??=

Refusing to stay stuck

Hello,

Hope you all are well. I hope you enjoyed the pictures from our small town trip. I have had a bacterial infection similar to a UTI for more than a week, and am on 500 mg of kefleex for three weeks. I have this friend/volunteer boss Molly who reads me blog, and she is sweet and supportive, and yet, She has something I have very little of.... What is that? She has a Backbone, and I mean that as a compliment. I run from conflict, like the plague. If my feelings are hurt, I do what is called stuffing, and it is not the taste good kind. If I am mad or my veiws are disregarded, I stay quiet, or just assume I should have never said anything, At times, it is the worst feeling in the world to want to speak up, and say hey I'm not okay with this, but the moment you do, your guilt tank kicks in, whether it needs to or not. It's like excuse my graphic picture, but when you have to pee so bad you think you will brust, but there is no place to go, so you hold it until there no possible way you can hold it anymore, in other words, your stuck... Your stuck unless you use whatever resources you have. At that point, you can no longer focus on how unfair the situation is just have to find a quick solution to your delima, you cannot stay stuck, you have to make a choice for better or worse. You can't look back, and replay the choice over in your mind, wondering if it is the right one. I am a lousy decision maker. I have trouble with even the smallest choices. I hold on to things, and memories even if I don't talk about them. I never really seem to let things go, even if on the outside it seems I do. But the Bible says: Phil. 3:14 says: www. Biblegateway.com Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. This is an important message to people like me who are stuck in or defined by their past mistakes, My mom always says don't worry about the past, because you cannot change it. I hate when she tells me that, because one it's hard to do, but also because it is such a painful truth. The freedom comes when we know that while we cannot change our past, we can learn from it. Paul had a painful guilt filled past, but somehow with God's love and forgiveness. he found freedom to forgive himself, and move on. He found victory! Lord I don't want to be stuck anymore. I''m choosing to forget, now please help me not remember. I'm ready to forgive myself, willing to forgive myself, to be used you. So, do you want to forgot, in order to take hold of Christ. If so, we are on the journey to begin again together

Small Town Trip Pics

Jellico TN. town were my mom and grandparents grew up

We stayed in Williamsburg Inn hotel in KY. About 25 miles from their hometown. Lovely hotel Family friend who live near by

Me very tired....

Family

My grandmother "Mumzie" we came because she was being honored by her high schoool class of 1949

Bill, Jackson,- 6 Months, Brady 3 Yrs, Jocelyn, 4 Years.

Jackson again

Jellico High school Audtioum



I was not feeling well, but it was still a good trip.

Cute ducks at the local park.

Fall leaves are ahead of us by a couple weeks

More than a book!

It is Not Just a Book
By: T.J. Ellis
September 1, 2008


It is more than book of fairytales or fables.
It is more than just a bestseller upon a bookstore shelf
It’s not just historical record or point of debate
It’s not a mere legend, as many might say.
It’s not just another book full of opinions written by noble people.
It is the Word of Life!
It is divine it is flawless.
It will stand the test time!
It provides hope to the weary soul.
Only these words can refresh hearts grown cold.
It does not sway with the way the wind blows.
It brings rebuke to the wicked, and comfort to mourners.
It contains the Good News!
It crosses racial barriers and political views.
No other book has such saving power.
Never have there been such words of hope in such a dark hour!

Celebration & Delight filled living Part 1

Hello,

Glad you all enjoyed the freckled Lemonade post! Good news my mom got her drain tube out on Friday, and right now they don't believe she will be needing additional surgery! Thank you for your prayers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please praise God with us!!!!!!!!!! She will return to work for a few days on Wed before fall break begins!

I know I have made mention of the word delight before, but think about the word for a minute. We have discovered that God delights in us, but what about us, where are we to find our delight? I don't know about you, but I often find fleeting delight in food, desserts movies, and relationships. I say fleeting because it never last. www.dictonary.com defines delight this way: a high degree of pleasure or enjoyment; joy; rapture. Honest confession from me, I have not been delighting in the Lord as much as I have been other things. I want to delight in the Lord, he alone can satisfy. So my question to you readers is what are some ways that you delight in the Lord? What does the phrase delight in the Lord mean to you? For you what does that look like? How do you make the Lord your delight? Ps. 37:4 " Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." I only want to focus this post on the first of the verse to start with, because I believe it is the foundation for the rest of the verse. I pray I learn to delight more deeply in the Lord. Thank you in advance for your responses! God is indeed so good!

Freckled Lemonade in honor of Dee!

Here it is...

This is supposedly The Red Robin Recpie, but I do not make that claim. It is really yummy @ Red Robin, I'll try to post the link another day!

Red Robin Freckled Lemonade

1/3 Cup frozen sweetened sliced strawberries, thawed1 Cup lemonadeCrushed iceGarnishLemon wedgeFill a 16 ounce glass with ice. Spoon strawberries with syrup over the top of the ice.Fiill the glass with lemonade.Add a lemon wedge and serve with a straw.Freckled Lemonade by the PitcherAdding sliced fresh stawberries and/or a few slices of lemon to the pitcher is a nice touch.2 Quarts Minute Maid Lemonade2 Cups frozen sweetened sliced strawberries, thawed Crushed ice1 Cup sliced fresh strawberries (optional)Lemon Slices (optional).To make by the pitcher (2 quarts): Add thawed strawberries and syrup into pitcher. Add crushed and sliced fresh strawberries, if using, to pitcher. Add crushed ice and gently stir in lemonade

Just a fun filled day!

Hi,

Today mom and I went a got our flu shots then we went clothes shopping and then got a snack @ the food court at the mall, went shopping some more. I got a nice top, and a cute brown sweater! I love sweaters! Mom visted the book story though I didn't go in because I know I could never resist buying something. We then met Jenn & Michelle @ Red Robin, there I ate my favorite chicken Tortila soup, and drank freckled lemonade! I noticed today how much weight mom has lost, but I also noticed how well she is doing, and how much fun she is having! I can hardly believe she will go back to work to a new job soon. Thank you for all your prayers! They are still keeping a close on things, but God is so Good!

Yes, there is still a writer inside me

I Saw Your Love
By: T.J. Ellis
September 27, 2009


I saw your love today as the wind blew across my face.
I heard your love in the melody that came as a soft whisper.
I touched your love as I witnessed the smile on a child’s face.
I saw your love through the beautiful sunshine.
I heard your love through the advice of a stranger.
I touched your love as I touched your creation.
I saw your love in the stroke of a paint brush.
I heard your love in the stillness of night.
I touched your love as I smelled the roses.
I heard your love in the form of laughter so sweet
I touched your love through the touch of human flesh.
I saw your love printed as a declaration, in words of red.
I heard your love through the singing of birds.
I touched your love, as I held a tiny sliver cross.
I saw your love through the kindness of a young man.
I heard your love through a simple prayer.
I touched your love as I touched the edge of grace!

Sweet truth!

Hi Bloggers:

Hope you are doing well! I'm having a good day! I am very glad it is suppose to be sunny tomorrow, it has rained for 2 weeks in Chattanooga TN, but thankfully we have had no major flood damage at our house. I am trying to catch up on your blogs. This past week was rather busy for me with AAA two days a week, 4 birthdays, visting with my cousin Jocelyn who is going to be at DisneyWorld for her fourth Birthday this Wed.
There is a lot I want to write about, but I don't have time right now, just wanted to say hello!
I am just going to quicky tell you that God reminded me recently that He can handle me! I know that sounds funny, but you know how sometimes we can be afraid of letting people know us for fear that if they really knew us they would run away? I have been feeling that way a lot, and it was so freeing to sense God saying Teej you can't scare me away. I'm not going anywhere. I love you! I accept you! What freedom there is in that truth.

Movie, Elvis's Brother, and God is there!

Hi Readers:



Hope you had a great weekend! I have had one of the best weekends in awhile. Yesterday I went to see Julie & Julia the movie! It was very good, I admit I really didn't expect to like it, because I am not into cooking, but it was funny, and contained a modern day love story as well! It also tells a story of a blog, by an every day woman! Then, today I was able to go to church for the first time in a month. We had a guest Evangelist for our church rally day. His name is Rick Stanley and he is the brother of Elvis Presley! He has amazing testimony! He a very humble man! It was truly a treat to hear what only God could do in his life!



Speaking of God doing a work.... God is teaching me a lot right now, but it is hard to process much less to write about at this point. I am sure you are familiar with the lyrics "All I have in your Lord, is more than enough for all of me! (SONG MORE THAN ENOUGH) It isn't until we are called to truly lay down our comforts and false idols, that we ever really know that the God we talk about really is more than enough. Sometimes we willingly offer our idols, while other times we find that in those moments when are too weak to surrender, and so God does a kind of stripping away of our safety net, which then causes us to honestly explore the question, Lord are you really? Can I really trust you with everything? In the past 2 years God has stripped away most of my false safety nets. Actually, he first removed my false sense of worth as an over achiever student 5 years ago, Then, he removed not just one but 3 friends who made me feel safe and loved. Then He removed my mom's health, not once, but twice. I still wait for healing in my relationship with a family member, and there seems to be no end to the strain in sight. God is the one who gives and the one who takes away. I will admit I wrestle with anger for the taking away part, but as I work through this, I am reminded that He Jesus is the source of everything! He has never owed me anything, and everything I have comes from his hand! Everything I'm given has been entrusted to me, based on nothing I deserve. He is the hope that does not disappoint the friend that never leaves. The refuge that does not crumble! The Father who does not ignore! Mary told Jesus that if He had been there, her brother would not have died, but Mary quickly saw that for the glory of God, Jesus waited and came at just the right time. Maybe like me you wonder what God is doing, or you may you think, God where were you when my child or friend died or moved away? Maybe your question is where where you God when my marriage fell apart? Where were you when my job fell through? Where where you when I was hurt so bad? Jesus was there. Yes, we wonder why an all powerful God would just be there waiting, instead of acting, but Jesus is there to minster even as the questions come, even as we wonder and prayerfully wait. He is with us even though.... The victory is ours, the comfort is ours, The hope is ours! The glory is His!

Relational Savior & Prayer Requests

Hi Bloggers:

I cannot begin to thank you enough for your encouraging comments in response to my last post! Thank you for such compassionate and truth filled responses. God has been answering your prayers. Speaking of prayers would you join me in praying for a couple of families?

1. Please pray for my cousins: Chris, Christy, and Trey. These siblings just lost their mother very unexpectedly. The funeral is tomorrow. They live in Cochran GA. Trey is in college and today is his birthday. Both Chris and Christy have spouses of their own, as well as 5 children if you count the grandchildren. Please pray for comfort and peace as they sort through all this.
2. Please pray for Beth-OneBlessedNana- A blogger and pastor's wife whose church is under spiritual attack. Please also pray for her and her family, that God will protect them and bless them.
3. Please pray for Sandra my friend who has endured Chronic pain who was preparing for major surgery, but it had to be put off, because she has shingles for the 3rd time.
Thank you so much!

I hope you all are having a great Labor Day! I was thinking today, how great it is to have a Savior who is relational! He became one of us, so that one day, we could be like him! He faced loneliness and sorrow, injustice and rejection. Jesus understands! He overcome death for us! www. bibleresources.com Heb. 2:18 "For since He Himself was tested and has suffered, He is able to help those who are tested.
Wherever we are on the road of life, Jesus understands! Your responses and prayers inspired this post!

Coming Clean!

I am not sure if this post is for my readers or for me but I need to do this. I have struggling for weeks on and off with my relationship with God. I don't know if it is apathy or hardness or what? I desired so much that the trials God has allowed in our lives recently would draw ever closer to God, and there have been times when this has been the case! I just cannot figure out when it was that I became inconsistent? Was it when mom had surgery all the chores or was it the craziness of it all? Did it begin then? Is it the constant list of excuses or the endless questions that continue to linger in my head in recent weeks. Questions that would cause most reasonable people to wonder if I am a christian at all. OK so, I know that's a bit extreme, but you get the idea. One thing I know is things need to change, more than that, it has to change! The one thing God continues to impress upon me is a word that I posted more than a month ago. Prov. 3:5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Do not rely on your own understanding. I am finding that the first step to learning to trust God and love God more is to admit my lack of trust. Before you pounce on me for typing that, I know that God is worthy of not just my trust, but my ongoing praise. He has carried my family ever step of the way, and for that I will give him praise!!!!!!!!! The truth is though, I am plagued with doubts and fears at times waiting for the other shoe to drop. Wondering why some get permanent healing, and then others only get healing for a little while. There are lots of others who don't get healing they long for until heaven, and then the hurting continues for their loved ones. You might wonder why I would be wrestling with these questions now, when all signs point to my mom's cancer being gone. I cannot give you an explanation, because I'm searching for one as well. There is a part of me that wonders, if God will somehow punish me or mom for my lack of belief that I've tried so hard to keep below the surface. I know no matter how messed up, I am, God is still God, and it's time to stop running from the truth, and run into the arms of Truth HIMSELF! Thank you for letting me write out loud!

Ephesians 2:10 Video by B-rad C - Powerful!

Ephesians 2:10 Video by B-rad C - MySpace Video

Shared via AddThis

Setback with Mom, but she is improving!

Hi EVERYONE;
August 26th
This is T.J. Mom had to return to the hosptial last night, because she was very sick, and was having a high fever. It turns out she has an infection in the lymph nodes of the incesion in her leg, but she does not have feeling there, so she did not know. They drained a lot of fluid today, and she sounds better today. They are giving her lots of meds. Sorry I have not updated sooner, but I've had a bug, and been out of it. Thanks for your prayers!

T.J. M'S daughter
Friday, August 28, 2009 3:27 PM, EDT


Hello,

Mom came home from the hospital late last night She is doing very well. She is eating well, and up and moving about though this takes great effort. She wanted me to tell you that she already has fluid building up, one of the doctors said they may have to go back in surgically to insert a tube, in order for the fluid to drain as it should. They are going to try and hold off on that until next Friday to see if this will be needed, because that is when her next appointment is. It may have to be done sooner, if the fluid does not drain properly. It is my understanding that too much fluid in her leg can cause infection, especially since she does not have feeling her upper leg, where they did surgery. So we would ask for your prayers in this matter, but this is a far more common problem than the previous ones she has endured. Mom and I have sat face to face today, and been able to chat which is such a gift from God! She is alert! Please don't misunderstand, she does tire easily, of course, but she at this point very improved and we praise God! I am hopeful this is a real turning point! Again, her appointment is Sept. 4Th. Thank you for your prayers and loving support!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so proud of our Mom!
T.J. on Madeline's behalf)


Hi Gang! I know you are probably ready for some posts that don't involve Mom's health, but since you all are praying, I still need to post these for awhile! thanks for bearing with me!

Urge to blog....

Hi Bloggers:
I warn you that I don't know how this blog will turn out. Good news mom is home from the hosptial! She is groggy and weak but home. Thank you for your prayers! I want you to know God is providing in all this! He is faithful! My grandmother who we live with fell and dislocated her finger. I have not felt well today. One of my aids was sick when sick last night, when she came, she said it was probably food posioning, but I'm just not at all sure. I'm not usually parnoid about sickness, but today I am. I actually was mad that she came and exposed my family and I to possible sickness right now. I know she probably meant well,
but....
I cannot seem to shake this anger I've been feeling lately, and yet there are streams of thankfulness as well. I have moments of numbness and just exagustion, but then I think where is this coming from it isn't as though, I'm working or going to school right now. I am having doubts about my blog content too as well since my blog was intentded to honor the Lord, and I am not sure that is what this blog is lately. Anyway thank you for sticking with me, I will one day be able to vist your blogs regularly.

3 in 1 Rollercoaster update on mom!

Tuesday, August 18, 2009 6:49 PM, EDT

Hello family and friends!

This is not the update that I expected to be giving you today. I have finally been able to get in here with the help of a good friend to update this page. Mom went to the doctor today expecting to get her staples out but for the last couple of nights she has had low grade fever, chills, and a large amount of bleeding from her incision site in her abdomen. They did a CT scan and decided that it would be best for them to do exploratory surgery to find out the cause of the bleeding. The doctors took her back to surgery at 7 minutes after 6. I am told that the surgery will take 1 to 2 hours and then she will be in recovery. The doctors sayshe will be in the hospital for 3 to 5 days. It is possible that the bleeding could be caused by stitches being torn or coming out or it could be something else. This is why the surgery is so important, to find the true cause of the bleeding. Margaret and Mumzie are at the hospital right now. I have had a special friend stay with me and now my assistant is here and available until late in the evening. I may not be able to update again this evening but I can put my number below if you wish to call or you can wait and I will do my best to update first thing tomorrow. God has been faithful through this whole process and even now His grace is sustaining us. I know that you will be in steadfast prayer and for that we thank you.

T.J.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009 8:31 PM, EDT

hello
I just wanted to quickly update you to let you know that mom is through with surgery. when i talked to my aunt last she said that mom was in recovery. She also said that the doctor was pleased with the outcome and is glad they were able to catch it early. They believe that at least on of the stitches got infected this is really all i know at this point. thank you so much for your prayers please keep praying. We are thankful for the victory we just had.
Thanks,
T.j.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009 12:46 PM, EDT


Hi All:

I am sorry I am only now updating, but it's been a busy day already. Mom did well last night. She is pretty out of it today,because she was nauseated really bad, so they gave her finagrin. She has waked today with the PT. I do have more info for you on what was actually done last night. They repaired a stitch that popped out, and had infection, which they think happened from having to cough. The doctor has placed permeant stitches on the inside. She is on a liquid diet, but that should only be for today. She is antibiotcs. The best of today was that I got to talk to mom on the phone for a few minutes. I was at AAA yesterday when all this happened, so it was kinda a lot to take in all at once. I don't know what I would have done, if my friend Courtnie had not stayed with me, because there was not time or a way for me to get to the hospital. God took care of every detail. Thank you to each one of you for all you've done!


Thanks,
T.J.
Thursday, August 20, 2009 6:29 PM, EDT


Hi All:

Mom has been up today! I talked to her a little bit ago, and her voice is so much stronger! She requested Chicken & rice for supper. She is off of most of what meds they have had her on. She was on round the clock antibiotics yesterday, 5 bottles worth. Justin visited her for a good bit of time today. It is looking like she might come home tomorrow!!!!!!!! I have not seen her since Tuesday. God is teaching me a lot about faith right now, and shown me how much unbelief is in my heart, He has ministered to me in so many ways today, and I know it is because you've prayed! I look forward to the day when my mom can update for you herself, as I know it will be a blessing to you all! I must be a broken record, but thank you so much for your love and support!
T.J.

Thank you bloggers for your prayer! Sorry I have not posted all this sooner it has been crazy!!!!!!!!!!! GOD IS ON HIS THRONE!!!!!!!

Another update on mom.... tough one for her...

Hi Everyone:

Mom has not had a good day. She has not been comfortable whatever position she is in. She has had some nagging, but normal problems that go along with adjusting to life with a colostomy bag. I can tell she really wants to be able to do things, but her body will not allow it. The process of waiting has never been easy for mom, but she is being better about it than most people would be. She will get her staples out Tuesday. I know she wants to update for you all herself, but of course is just not feeling well enough yet. She enjoys your comments. She has numbness in the top of her leg, which doctors say could be short term or long term. The doctors told her this could be a possibility. God is faithful! Thank you for all you done. Please pray the healing process will go by fast for mom. You know how positive mom is; please pray with me that God would give her strength as she recovers. That God would protect her against discouragement. I’m asking him to give her grace for each moment. That she would feel free to vent in the tough times, and receive understanding. We are so proud of her. It is more than understandable that this process would be frustrating for her. She is laying in my bed in hopes that my hospital bed will be more comfortable. Thanks for reading! Each day will bring improvements. Thank you again! Our family is thankful for your kindness and support you’ve shown through prayers, flowers, food etc. God’s mercies are new each day
T.J.

Praise Report 2 She is home!

I just wanted you to know, in cause you have not heard that mom is home!!!!!!! She got home around noon today, and was very please with all the flowers, gifts, plants, etc many of you have given and sent to her. Thank you! I just saw her home for the first time since she she got home about an hour ago. every one insisted I go to AAA as usual, and I did, because the minstry is like second family to me. I could hardly wait to get home to see mom though, so I signed out a bit early. She has slept many hours since being home. Justin put Macy the dog on a leash so mom could pet her. Macy was so sweet with mom, and I am sure she was great medicine for mom too. I know I would have cried if I had witnessed the moment. I don't have much news at this point. I'll update as the process continues. I believe mom is so happy to be home, and we are so happy too! Please keep up those prayers and praises! Thank you all for everything!!!
T.J.
Hi Bloggers: Above is the lastest update! Thank you for your prayers and support! We are one step closer to "normal" Miss you guys!

Praise REPORT and continued prayers!

I am so excited to write this post for you all. I just talked to mom on the phone and she said the pathology report came back and the cancer is gone! Let me type that again so it will sink in better. They were able to get all of the cancer, only one lymphnode came back as cancer and it is now out.If Mom is able to eat solid foods between now and tommorow she will be able to come home at some point tomorrow. We are all so excited to have her home and can hardly wait for tommorow to come.Thank you so much for your continued prayers throughout this process.We are praising the Lord for this incredible news. We still know that there are hurdles to climb and recovery that still needs to take place. Hopefully if there is additional information to pass on to you I can do that once I talk to Mom further. She is now taking a nap and Mumzie is tearfully rejoicing. My friend Michelle and her adorable son Alex are spending some time with me today and it was wonderful to hear such good news with her. None of us have a guarantee of what tommorow will bring as far as this life goes, but I am reminded that we always have HOPE in our Lord Jesus Christ. We hope you will join in the celebration wtih us and continue praying for mom as it is still a slow process. We are thankful for all of you.
T.J.

Steady Progress....

Hi All:

I wanted you all to know Mom slept from 10 PM to 2:00 AM, which in the hospital is pretty good. She no longer has a pain pump which I’m sure she will miss, but she will take pains meds by mouth. She continues to show improvements a little every day. She wanted my aunt to bring my hair rinse tray board, so she could wash her hair. Mom has always been one of those people who want to wash her hair every day. Her best times surprisingly seem to be mornings, as she of course tires easily. By the time I got there last evening she was wiped out. She walked a longer distance on the walker yesterday, and her catheter has been out a couple days now, so that increases to the amount of walking she does as well. If I didn’t mention it before her epidural is out. One of her drainage tubes was removed, she has two still in. Has already walked today. She ate grits this morning. She has started to have some visitors for short periods of time. I say short periods, because sometimes it takes energy to talk, if she has had a busy or difficult day. The smallest tasks take big effort, but she is improving! God is faithful! My aid was kind enough to type the update yesterday for me. Our Dad’s sister is being very kind to come visit me today as she and her Son my cousin visited with Mom & Justin at the Hospital last night!. She and her family live near Macon and are some of the most generous people in the world. Thank you all for your gifts, cards and most of all prayers. I’ll update again soon
T.J.

VICTORY IN JESUS ONE STEP @ A TIME!

Mom made it through her 7 hour surgery Monday. THANK YOU FOR YOUR PRAYERS! HERE IS TODAY'S UPDATE THANKS!

Hello All:

I apologize for the delay, today is the first day that I’ve been home for any length of time. Mom went to her own room yesterday. Yesterday was not a good day for mom. The first night she had tingling and numbness in her legs which is a side effect one of the medicines in her epidural, so they were not able to get her up yesterday due to that, and low BP. They changed her med, so that problem was solved. Praise God. Yesterday when I saw her she was very confused, but this of course is very natural for the amount of meds she has had, but glory, I’m so thankful she has meds! Yesterday her nurse commented about how mom has not complained one time about anything. I smiled and quickly said, no she never has been one to complain, at least not on the outside. That is God’s power and grace, and evidence of your prayers and her faith. Today mom had a rough morning with nausea and pain, but she has had a better afternoon. Last night she slept well until about 4:30, when her pain meds were nearly out, and after that she slept until 7:00 AM. She still does not talk much which is totally understandable, but she is more alert. She requested her cell phone, and to stay by herself tonight. They are still suppose to get her up out of bed tonight, and we all dread it for her, but know it must be done. I have not seen her today, but tomorrow after my shift at AAA I will spend the evening with her, and I look forward to seeing her improvements since last night. Most of the family ate dinner together at the hospital last night, and we will have funny stories to tell mom when she comes home Thank you for your ongoing prayers and support!
T.J.
T

preparing for mom's surgery,,,,

Mom's surgery is tomorrow @ 7 AM. I'M USING my grandmother's laptop, so i don't have long. It is hard to type. ('m in bed. long story. thank you fot your prayers! i will post ;ater.

Keep Abortion Out of Health Care

Keep Abortion Out of Health Care

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Before and After! My Bedroom Part 1

The teal is before the pink is after! Sorry the photos are dark. Butterflies is the new room theme. More later.......

Life List, Chosen Ones, and More...

Hi Bloggers:

Thank you for your prayers! Today, I want to do a couple things. A friend and fellow blogger inspired me to make an ultimate to do list for my life. Here I go, the only problem is I don't truly think half of it will happen, but I'll make the list for fun.

1. Go to Hawill

2. Have my first adult kiss.

3. Reconcile with loved one

4. Get a fulfilling job that pays reasonable.

5. Write a book and have it published

6. Lead Someone to Christ

7. Visit Fayetteville GA,

8. Meet Kirk Cameron

9. Go to DC.

10 Lay on the grass under the stars.

11. Read all of Karen Kingsbury's books

12. Have my own place

13. Be a public speaker.

14 Go on a cruise

15 Have lunch with Michael W Smith.

16. Sing karaoke.

17. Meet Mike Huckabee.

18. Host a formal party

19 Go on a cruise.

20 Have a daughter for a week.

21. Go to disneyworld.

22 Have a wedding/honeymoon/marriage.

23. Be completely content for an entire week 24/7

24. Feed the hungry children

25. Talk someone out of hurting themselves

26. Go to CA.

27. Fast

28 Meet Rick Warren

29Have a good looking guy tell me I'm beautiful, and know he means it

30. Go swimming again.

31 Learn to like Salad.

32 Hang out with John Erickson Tada

You know sometimes I think the things we think we want and dream about are often more fun in minds and hearts, than they are in life, I mean like the saying says the grass is always on the other side. It is weird, but sometimes I find that unfulfilled dreams can often bring me more joy than the reality not matching up with me ideals. Maybe that makes me totally crazy, but it makes me fantasy world far richer.

Next topic... Rejection-If you have lived hardly any time at all, then I know you have faced rejection either real or imagined or both. You also know how great and humbling it is to be chosen. I remember when I was chosen by my peers in high school to be a senior court attendant. I tried to keep my cool, but inside I was soaring. There has since been a debate, as to why they actually voted for me, but if nothing else, it was God's gift to me. What joy there is in being chosen. We are wired with a longing to be chosen! I have been reminded afresh what the Bible tells us about being chosen. The Bible tells us that God CHOSE us, we did not choose him! It also lets us know in Eph 1 that because God chose us, he also favors us. It is cool as I think it must be true that God not only loves me, but he actually likes me too. I have plenty of people who love me, but I often wonder how much they like me lol. Do you know what a huge deal that is? The same is true for all who trust in Christ. Christ both likes and loves us! Oh how I need the Lord to remind me when the darkness is so very thick. Rest in the realty chosen ones!

FYI The word chosen itself appears 123 times in the Bible Thank you for your comments!

I am so in love with Ryan PG13

I am in love with Ryan!!!!! Ok so I know this isn't my usual blogging format, but I needed a little fun! Hope you guys understand. You can see Ryan in the movie the propsal out now! FYI mom's surgery is planned for August 3rd 7 AM! I will have some more devotional posts as well as pictures of my new room.

I'd Rather Have Jesus!

Hi Blogging friends,

Thank you so much for your kindness and compassionate response to me regarding my last post. I have saved your comments, and will read and reread these. Glenda, Thank you so for the verses. Beth, I feel your prayers. Val, Thank you for such love and grace. I feel so loved! Dee, you are amazing! It seems like you have a window to my soul! Thank you All! I have however decided to delete my former post, so it will not have any way of causing visitors to stumble, as we never know how what we write might cause others to give into some form of temptation.

I thank you for your prayers. I am doing better today. I would love to have some wisdom to share, but I'm in a learning process myself at the moment. Mom is in good spirits as always, we will know more on Tues. Jenn will be home Wed, can't wait! I will ask though, do you find that God sometimes uses music to minster to you when other means don't seem to get your attention? I was listening to the Hymn I'd Rather Have Jesus, and it isn't like I hadn't heard it, but somehow it seemed to reach me today. So I did some research. www.allaboutGod.com

I’d Rather Have Jesus – The History I’d Rather Have Jesus is a song written by Rhea F. Miller with the tune written by George Beverly Shea. This poem, written in 1922, was left on a piano in the Shea home by Bev Shea who wanted her son to find it and change the course of his life. The words, I’d rather have Jesus, moved George so much and spoke to him about his own aims and ambitions in life. He sat down at the piano and began singing them with a tune that seemed to fit the words. Shea’s mom heard him singing it and asked him to sing it at church the next day. . I’d Rather Have Jesus – The Lyrics I’d rather have Jesus than silver or gold; I’d rather be His than have riches untold; I’d rather have Jesus than houses or lands, I’d rather be led by His nail pierced hand. Than to be a king of a vast domain Or be held in sin’s dread sway, I’d rather have Jesus than anything This world affords today. I’d rather have Jesus than men’s applause; I’d rather be faithful to His dear cause; I’d rather have Jesus than world-wide fame, I’d rather be true to His holy name. He’s fairer than lilies of rarest bloom; He’s sweeter than honey from out of the comb; He’s all that my hungering spirit needs, I’d rather have Jesus and let Him lead. I’d Rather Have Jesus – The Bible’s Support This hymn is about dedication and commitment. To follow after Jesus is costly. Matthew 16:24-26 says: “Then Jesus said to his disciples, ‘If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?’” I’d rather have Jesus than silver or gold. . . Philippians 1:21 reminds us: “For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.” I’d rather have Jesus and let Him lead. . . Philippians 3:8 says, “What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ.” I’d rather have Jesus than world-wide fame, I’d rather be true to His holy name. . . Praise God for the words of Rhea Miller and the caring of Bev Shea. Because of them, George followed after Jesus and we are blessed with the fruit. Hope this blesses you all, as it did me.

Update and Happy 4th!

Hi Bloggers:

Thank you for all your prayers for mom and family. We won't know the results of her biopsy or scan for a couple weeks. The scan didn't give her harsh side effects like before, so this an answer to prayer. The doctor says it will take a couple weeks to get over the biopsy. Thank you! I know a lot of my posts have consisted of this new development in our lives, I hope you understand. I will label the post, in case there are only ones or topics you wish to read.

Happy 4th! While mom has little energy she still wants to go to my Aunt's house tonight as usual. I am very thankful for those who serve our country to protect us. I am thankful for their families who sacrifice so much! As Christians we have more than one freedom to celebrate! Gal. 3:28 www.biblegateway.com There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. Enjoy your freedom, the price for it has been paid!

The first of many updates

Hi Bloggers:

Hope your week is winding up well! Thank you for your prayers for my mom. I have not heard anything yet. She has a caringbridge page, you can subscribe to for updates, if you wish. You do have to register though. The site is: www. caringbridge.org The page name is: Madelineellis I sense your prayers. God is good! More posts soon.

Cancer Back, and Prov. 3:5-6

Hi gang:

Hope all is well your way. We found out this week that my mom's cancer has returned. I don't know the extent of it yet. She is having a Pet scan on Thurs, and a surgical biopsy. I think I knew it was coming, and that is why my mood has been lacking. God has comforted me, and I know he will be faithful. I know we all have trials and we must cast our cares upon Christ. I do not know what you maybe facing in your lives, but I am reminded that we must not rely on our own understanding, but we must trust our God who understands all things! Prov. 3:5-6 Blessings,

T.J.

I''m enjoying your blogs!

From Bitterness to Thankfulness

Hi Gals:

Wow!!!!!!!!!!! So much to write. I want to begin with a thankful list. I know others do this weekly, but I want to do it now.

1. I''m thankful for God's grace upon my life I don't deserve to be his daughter, but I am.

2. I know it sounds funny, but I'm thankful God does not let me know what is going to happen before it does sometimes.

3, I'm thankful my stomach is intact today.

4, I'm thankful for a back up chair when my breaks down like today.

5. I'm thankful for running water, as I think about how Jenn doesn't have any.

6. I'm thankful for doggy kisses

7. I'm thankful my mom can get medical coverage.

8. I'm thankful my mom is here on earth.

9. I'm thankful my brother can go on the mission trip tomorrow.

10. I'm thankful for Michelle and the new bible study we are doing together called Me, Myself, and Lies

11. I'm thankful Jenn will be home in three weeks.

12, I'm thankful for Sandra Rose

13. I'm thankful for Dr. John Barber, and the depth of wisdom he has.

14. I'm thankful for the fact that sometimes long distance friendships really do work.

15. I'm thankful God is true to his promises. As you can see: I have endless reasons to choose thankfulness over bitterness!

I have been struggling with bitterness in life in general lately. It is amazing how when we choose thankfulness it transforms us, lifts us up. Christians most of all, have no shortage of reasons to be thankful. Does that mean I should go around pretending life is peachy all the time? No, the truth is there are days I wonder why in the world I am here? I often think wouldn't my life serve a greater purpose in heaven than here? I often feel out of place in this world. It isn't that there aren't wonderful things about this life, there are. Laughter joy lessons beauty, It's all here, but it is all perfected in heaven! It is tempting to think I am useless here. Yet I know God placed me here to glorify himself, and who I am to tell him otherwise. I am on the second of the new Bible Study, to be honest It hasn't really occurred to me much that God wants honor from my thoughts. My mom is having biopsies done, they found a spot, but the doctor things it's only scar tissue. Keep you posted. I've added some new music Jenn!

R&R PDL Devotional!

This minstered to me so much I had to post, and I'm going to spend time at his feet. Thanks Sandra!

Be Real and Be Relaxed With God
by Rick Warren

"Be still, and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world" (Psalm 46:10 NLT).

Hurry is the death of prayer. If you rush through all your prayers, it will kill your prayer life.
I have a habit in my prayer life: before I pray any prayer, it is almost spontaneous that I take a deep breath. I just relax, settle down, and let go of any tension. Then, I'm ready to talk God.

So, when you pray, relax. Take a deep breath and try to forget anyone or anything that's around you and just focus in on God for a minute. Calm yourself down and get still: "Be still, and know that I am God!" (Psalm 46:10 NLT).

Jesus sat in Martha's house, but she was so busy, she couldn't stop to talk to Him and enjoy His company. Jesus said, "Martha, Martha! You are worried and troubled over so many things, but just one is needed. Mary has chosen the right thing, and it will not be taken away from her" (Luke 10:41-42 TEV). Mary chose to relax at the feet of Jesus, listening to him while "Martha was distracted" (Luke 10:40 NIV).

Be real and relaxed, "Go to your room, close the door, and pray to your Father, who is unseen. And your Father, who sees what you do in private, will reward you" (Matthew 6:6 TEV).

Quickie Silly Night time post!

A - Age: 26 B - Biscuits or Bagels: biscuits of course C- Chore you hate: Being peace keeper D - Dog's name: Macy my brother's dog E - Essential start your day item: Time alone with my Bible, uninterrupted F - Favorite color: Teal G - Gold or Silver: Sliver H - Height: Short, Short, I - Instruments you play(ed): None J - Job title: Job is a funny word K - Kid(s): 0 L - Living arrangements: Complex M - Mom's name: Madeline not to be confused w/ Madelyn. N - Nicknames: Teej, T, T.J. That girl in the wheelchair O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth, yeah several. P - Pet Peeve: People who ask how are you, but don't really care how you are Q - Quote from a movie: " Oh Capitan my Capitan R - Right or left handed: Right S - Silblings: Justin T - Time you wake up: 8:30 or Later U- Underwear: Overrated V - Vegetable you dislike: Most of these W - Ways you run late: Talk, or my mom X - X-rays you've had: Arm, Hips, Back leg foot Y - Yummy food you make: nothing Z - Zoo favorite: Otter`

I tag whoever reads this!