Keep an Open Heart about Miracles

Do you ever find yourself searching, waiting looking expecting a miracle?   Do you ever wonder why some people seem to get theirs right a way, while others wait months even years or even until eternity at times for answers or relief?  Lately, I've had conversations with multiple people as we wrestle prayerfully and reverently with this question... Every time my mom went into remission, I thought here is it is.  The miracle we have looked for, and it was for a season in time, and I'm still thankful for it.  A road once marked with little hope, in the form of a clinical trial, was it my ideal hope dream for my mom?  Nope, in all honesty, there was a  time about 2 years ago when I wanted desperately total healing and anything else seemed unfathomable.  Do I still want and wish for total healing for my mom and others I love yes.  Right now, her miracle is slight decreasing in the cancer, and that is a miracle!    Do I believe in miracles oh yes.  I am learning to view miracles differently now, but it continues to be a work in progress.  I don't talk about it much, but on rare occasions, a very few people have said God's will is always to Physically heal people.  There are some churches who teach this very thing, I beg to differ.  God is not limited to one type of healing. Healing comes in different forms.  Healing comes sometimes, a little more every day, in the form of grace carrying a person moment by moment hour by hour.  Some miracles come in the words your condition is stable or improving when just weeks before it seems you had run out of options.  The Gospel itself is a miracle.  The fact that your reading this, and I am writing it, is a remarkable gift.  I'm waiting on miracles too, but the act of trusting and expressing thanks and praise even in waiting is in itself is a miracle.  It might not be in the time frame or form you thought it might come in, but God often changes our thinking to match his, and the fact that you and I can relate as frail human beings to the living God IS and always will be the greatest miracle in all of history.  The fact that God listened to me as I lifted up names in prayer today is miraculous.  When Christians around the globe stand for Christ, even though their lives are in danger, is the power of God's miraculous work!  Often our hearts become numb to the wonderful work God is doing, because we have closed our eyes, and chosen not to see God's fingerprints in our lives.     I'm asking God to open my eyes, to remember and praise Him for "big" and "little" miracles alike.  Will you do the same, and then lets share God's works with many around us, who need to be reminded that God Is working, because celebrating God's works, will always bring us back to his heart! 

    yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.¹² I will consider all your works    and meditate on all your mighty deeds.”¹³ Your ways, God, are holy.    What god is as great as our God?¹⁴ You are the God who performs miracles;    you display your power among the peoples.  PS. 77:12-14.  www.biblegateway.com 

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Since God has performed miracles in the past, we can rejoice, and trust He is still working.  We must not be narrow minded in the way we view miracles.  Embrace the wonder of what God did in the past, and trust his ways for us when we are looking for and waiting upon his miracles in our present.  For more on a day by day miracle visit  http://www.comingaliveministries-jenn.com/2013/03/joy.html My friend Jenn Hand's blog.  Please continue to pray for Mike Hand and others who need God's touch.  We all need miracles in so many areas.  Let's praise God for what He has done, and is still doing in our lives!  

Leaning the Right Way When Cancer Strikes...

This post is in honor of the Hand family, and other walking miracle people in my life, like my mom. You can lean on me, and more important, you can and are leaning on our Faithful God!  

          In high school my friends and I used this as this as a theme song of sorts.  I have always liked the song though it was popular at a time before I was born.  This song always makes me smile when I hear it.  It makes me think of  classmates and FCA gathering in our basement.  I've needed, something to make me smile this past week.  One reason is because last week I came down with Chicken Pox, and it has been painful which I didn't expect.  I went to the ER last Thursday.  That same day I got the news that my 2 dear friends who are twins- there dad had just been told he has acute Leukemia.  It was like a knife cutting through my heart as my dear shared the news.  I was not so much hurting for myself, though I love her dad so much and he and Mama Hand as we call them, have always treated me like royalty.  I would have done anything in that  moment to ease my friend's pain.  "God please not this, not cancer, don't ask this of them, don't ask them to walk this path."  I flashed back to how sick my mom was during her aggressive chemo.  I tried to sound strong for my friend, but the hurt overwhelmed me in the moment.  All I knew to do was say how sorry I was, to promise my love and prayers.  Our  friendship is one I don't worry i'll ever lose. This is rare for me in relationships.  We have made it through foreign countries, secret crushes, and more.  I also flashed back to words God gave me during one of the darkest times finding out my own Mom's  cancer was back yet again.  "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. Prov. 3:5  I heard the verse in a sermon about a month ago, and all but fell apart for many reasons.  1. I often don't trust God and his ways, but I'm learning to more daily 2. I sometimes lean on other things or people when there are things I don't understand about life, like cancer or other disappointments in life, instead of leaning on the Everlasting Arms of God.    I have a side piece on my chair that keeps me from leaning too far on my right side.  It works so well at times that all my weight shifts to the left side at times making my body unbalanced.  In those times when I have chosen to lean on God with everything, He has never once failed me.  He has never turned me away or mocked my need for him.  He does not find my burden too heavy or my hurt too deep.  I struggle sometimes with the false idea that God sees me as insignificant, but his word says otherwise.  God invites you and me  to come to him in our brokenness.  When we choose not to lean on God we are acting in rebellion..       Like me, I bet there are things you don't understand in your life.  Guess what our lack of understanding does not justify our lack  of trust.God.  However God does understand that we are frail  The hardest thing in the world is to trust God's heart, when we don't understand his ways .  It can be done- when we lean on God.  I've seen it,  I've seen in my mom and in my best friends lives. More than that God is teaching me and has taught me, he is enabling me to lean on him.  It is not wrong to lean upon others, or let others lean on us, but if we fail to lean on Jesus most, we are not leaning the right way, and no one else can uphold us like Jesus can and does!.  Ps. 18:30 Ps.33:4. He is trustworthy!  He can be trusted with the our unknowns.  He can be trusted to fulfill his promises!  He can be trusted to forgive us, to give us hope moment by moment hour by hour.  He can be trusted when others leave us behind or leave us out.  He can be trusted when the world around us feels as if it is caving in. He can be leaned upon rain or shine, dark or light.  I want to lean the right way, which is in trusting the heart and nature of God.  Do you hear him inviting us to lean upon his Everlasting Arms?  

BUSY SIGNAL

It is a couple weeks short of being two months since my last post.  It has been a busy couple months.  I am without a personal computer which makes it hard to post...  A new computer came today, hopefully it can be setup soon!  I have family coming in this weekend.  I have recently been dealing with Carpal Tunnel and other chronic health, issues but nothing serious.  Being away from the computer has made me more prayerful which I've needed.  I miss visiting your blogs.    Mom got a good report last scan, there has been small deceases in some of the cancer, and no growth in the other areas!  Praise the Lord!  I have had a couple speaking engagements lately that by God's grace have gone amazingly well!  Also fundraising for Choices, which is near to my heart...  Hope to hear from you all... I will visit your blogs soon, Lord willing!  

I'm SO Excited, and I Just Wont Hide it! Part 1

                           

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Have you ever had a season in life where you were just bursting to make a big announcement, like you have something you are just itching to tell something to someone and then as your excitement builds, and you finally do tell the big news, you are disappointed by the lack of excitement expressed by the person receiving the news?  I get excited pretty easily.  I'm not the type of person who finds it easy it to conceal my joy or my sadness.    So often when I share my excitement, people are like okay that's great, but can we move on now?  If you go back a couple posts before my last one, you will see that I have been on a journey in my own faith walk to discover and embrace the compassionate nature of God.  I have to be honest, a few months ago, I would not have claimed that compassion of God was a concept that entered my mind too often, at least, not in the context of God desiring to show me compassion.  However. for some time now, every verse I read brings me back to God's own kindness towards me AND YOU.  I suspect strongly that many people might say this concept excites me too much, but this is one time I'll say I beg to differ.  When you have wrested with doubts, and believed that God is distant and uninterested in you and the details of your life, then the promise of God's compassionate and merciful hand is like fireworks on the fourth of July or water in the desert.  When we see that God forgives us and willingly offered to forgive us by paying our sin debt because He loves and values us, it changes the way we relate to God.  Maybe I should write it this way, it has changed how I relate to God.    Are you trusting what others have shown you or told you about God, or are you inviting God to show you who He is?  Do you run or hide from the compassion and forgiveness of God or do you receive it with gladness and a thankful heart?  Friends I hope with all my heart, that you are able to dwell in the wonder of God's love, forgiveness and acceptance of you.  There is so much in this to be excited about.  As wonderful as it will be to spend eternity with God as believers, we don't have to wait to experience so many of the amazing benefits of living eternal life right now.  There is more than the future promise of heaven, there is the unshakable reality of God's comfort, compassion and forgiveness NOW.  It does not mean we won't have pain, now or conflict now or questions now, but we can endure these things, if we believe that God cares about us.  that we are safe, and forgiven!  So tell me what has rocked your world lately?  What has the world accused you of being too excited about?  Or maybe you need to get excited about how blessed we,- you and I actually are!
Blessed is the one
    whose transgressions are forgiven,
    whose sins are covered.
² Blessed is the one
    whose sin the Lord does not count against them
    and in whose spirit is no deceit. Ps. 32:1-2  Text found here
   

As if this were not enough for me to be excited about I was nominated for a local award called the Susan Ritzhaupt Award given to people with physical disabilities who do volunteer work.  Such an honor so humbled.  I never had any desire or plans to be a disability poster girl, but I'm so blessed God is good!  For those of you who pray for my mom regarding her cancer trial, she has had only some very slight growth, and does very well with all she has been through,  We are both on the mend now.  Her iron is pretty low, so that will be watched closely.  I loved our vacation to the beach It was like heaven to me!  Pictures should be posted in entry soon.    Thanks for your comments, I value these....     

The BIG "C- Christ, is Able to fight the little "c- cancer

tonight I  write you my readers, with a heavy heart for a few people fighting the little c- cancer.  This idea of the little c cancer did not originate with me, but I heard it when my mom first found out she had cancer in 2008.  It isn't that cancer is a little thing at all.  What is true though is the Big C stands not for cancer, but for Christ.  At another time, I will write about how my mom is doing, and the journey we are on, but right now I want to ask you to pray for a 16 year old girl named Jordan who has cancer of the brain from my church.  She will begin the radiation process tomorrow.  Please remember her and her family in your prayers.  Please pray for healing, comfort, peace, and strength!  Pray for her daily.  If I continue to learn anything in the past 4\ years, it is this... No matter what, Christ will always be bigger than cancer.  I don't always know what that looks like, but I know it is true!  
  Please also pray for my blogger friend Beth, whose sister is in the wanting process of test results!  Thank you!  

Trip with Mom to SCRI In Nashville

Dear Friends,

I am still processing many things in mind as I write.  Last Wed I went with my mom to Nashville for her SCRI visit.  This is where she has been undergoing a clinical trial, since they adjusted her dose most of her terrible side effects have stopped   I didn’t know what to expect, but I’m so glad I went.  While I don’t know any patients by name, I felt strangely bonded and comforted, and saddened  in knowing that they  too were facing the very same fight, sure the type of cancer might be different as well as the story, but the journey is much the same as my mom’s.  There is this silent understanding that I sensed as I observed this room full of cancer fighters and survivors.  Each different ages, different classes, and personalities, nonetheless connected by a path they would have never willingly chosen   I chuckled inside myself as a man battling cancer in his later years, instructed a woman with him, I assume she was his wife of many years, how to use her new high tech cell phone.  The two of them were quite humorous, and exchanged dirty inside jokes about each other.  I honestly didn’t know which one of them was fighting cancer, but was surprised by how at ease and familiar they seemed in their surroundings.     Mom and I met a couple who was from AL, but the husband grew up in Chattanooga on Danby Drive.  His liver cancer had reached a point where doctors even at SCRI told him they could no longer help him, and it was time to call in Hospice.  They took him off all treatments, and told him the end was near.  Shortly after that he began to feel better, so they did a scan and discovered that his cancer had reversed, God did a miracle in this man’s life.  His cancer is now the size of a twinkle in his liver and He is now able to undergo a clinical trial at SCRI.  There was another woman there from Chattanooga who took the Greyhound bus to get there.  I was reminded how blessed mom and our family is to have so much support.  I met a lady who offered me a soda while mom was in lab.  She was older, and I loved that despite the fact that she has incurable kidney cancer, and cancer of the shoulder, she still took time to notice me.  I asked her how long she had been coming, and she said a little over a year.  She said if this trial did not work she was going home, by home she meant heaven. She started to cry a little, and I felt bad for asking.  Almost as quickly as tears came, a peace came across her face, and she said “I know where I’m going” She said, the hardest thing would be leaving her family.  She showed me pictures of her grandchildren, and I realized on some level she wanted to share her story.  What she asked me next surprised me, she didn’t ask me about my wheelchair, which is what most people do, she asked me if I knew where I was going when I died, and if I had ever been baptized, to both questions I responded yes with a smile on my face, I don’t know if she asked about baptism, because she thinks baptism is needed to get to heaven, but I know I’ve prayed for her since our trip, and I hope I see her soon.  There was also a man who has been through 47 cycles on the same trial and is doing well.  I learned so much from this short trip.  One, I learned how blessed I am.  I learned there is always Hope.  I know we as Christians are suppose to believe it, and I suppose I have on some level, but it’s deeper now.    I discovered or rather was reminded that there are caring doctors.  There was a peace in knowing God can do anything!  Last, I remembered to cherish life in the moment, and not longing for more, but embracing the gift of a moment!  As a side note, I love the Lifeway  store in Nashville, and enjoyed the park with my mom after our time at SCRI.  I discovered that some patients stay in Nashville for months at a time, and how thankful I am my mom can make the weekly trips, and I’ve not had to be away from her from for more than a few days at a time.   

Tell me how your life is going?  Thanks for all your prayers for mom and us!

Standing on The Promises!

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I don't know if most of you are still with me, but mom starts her second round of chemo tomorrow, and I covet your prayers for her health, healing, and well-being!  Also for us as a family well.   I don't have a long message for you tonight, but God keeps giving me the same message, and I want to share it with you!  1. God is for You!  In others words if you belong to him, He is always on your side...  If you are like me you may be tempted to think that when bad things happen in life, it is somehow a sign God is mad at you or that He is against you, but He is Not!    This comforts me to know He God is for me and you!  2. God says No matter what happens He will work it out for those who love him and are called according to his purpose!  Romans 8:28 is your proof!  3. He promises never to leave or forsake his children!  4.  He promises us that no matter what trials we face, we will not and cannot be separated from the amazing love of God!  I am clinging tightly to these realities, and I hope that these minster to you as they have me!  Good night blogland!   

He Fights For You and Me!

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The image you see is a paraphrase of Exodus 14:14.  Last night, a friend text me the verse and in truth it could not have come at a more needed time!  My mom was violently    sick from Tues to Thurs from chemo, I got the crud on Tues, my regular caregiver was on a needed vacation, and by last bight I was coming unglued.  The truth is I have given my mom's heath to the Lord on a regular basis, but I've not prayed so much about my own personal care, which with having cerebral Palsy does involve a lot.  I battle shame constantly about other people having to clean up after me.  The feelings of humiliation are at times nearly unspeakable as adult.   I keep thinking that one day I will get use to it, and while it is easier at times, I never get use to it.  I thought this morning Jesus our Savior knows what humiliation looks like.  He knows what it feels like!  He tasted it as He hung on the cross!  He did nothing to warrant such agony.  He endured it out of faith, trusting The Father to bring his plan to pass!   Sometimes we don't know all the reasons God allows things to happen in our lives, but He has promised to fight on our behalf, the problem often comes when we are too prideful to admit we need him!  I cannot change my situation, but I can humble myself and admit I need God!  Admit I need him to change my perspective, I need him to strengthen, me and fill me, up! You need the Lord to fight your battles too, you may think the battles are small enough to face on your own, but like me you will discover you can't.  But when relying upon Christ we realize our battle has already been won!  We know that we have been given a Conquer Status!  The Lord will fight for us, as He did for  Israel, the bigger question is will we chose the path of faith, and rest in him, until we see the results of victory?  I'll pray for you and you pray for me, as we rest in the One who fought the ultimate battle for us!

When Believing is Hard, There is Our Peace

from PinterestOn January 13th, 2011 I posted about a list of blogs topics I hoped to cover...  Find that post here  Truth be told, this has not been my most creative or productive year in blogland, but tonight I will cover one on my topic list. "When Believing Is Hard"     Normally by this time, I would have written several Christmas themed posts, but life has happened.  Let me just get this out of the way...  Yesterday it was officially confirmed that my mom has cancer for the 5th time in her life.  I won't go into major details here except to say that she will have 24 chemo for 5 days starting Tues after Christmas.    God has been preparing for me for a couple weeks now, and I'm at peace, and we are very hopeful.  I have laid my Issac on the altar, and I am surrendered until the Lord!  It has  taken a long time to get here.  Faith is choosing to trust and submit to his plan, Knowing He is loving and Good.  In first John it says there is no darkness in him at all!  Faith is saying I love You Lord, and I am yours no matter what!  Faith is I'll trust you regardless of how I feel, because You're God, and I'm not.  Am I confused? Yes!  Do I have moments where it scares me?  Yes!  Do I wonder what God is doing?   yes!  Do I wish there were some other way for God's purpose to be fulfilled?  OH SO MUCH!  But    I love the Lord, because He first loved me!  Because He lives I can face tomorrow, and if you know the Prince Of Peace, you can too!  Romans 4:20 @ www. crosswalk.com   "Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God."      Abraham knew his situation looked less than promising.  He knew the odds biologically were not favorable, but He chose trust.  Did he stumble and sin, yes, but his faith was evident.   Do we allow our trials to draw us to God our cause us to drift from him?  Wresting with belief is hard, but something God is showing me is if we have faith as a mustard seed, He will grow into something far greater.  May Romans 4:20 be true of you and me!  Thanks for your prayers for mom and my family!

All the Way my Savior Leads!

http://www.carepages.com/carepages/Handyman TO GET UPDATES....

                               My post on 11/5/2011 was about a close friend recently diagnosed with Bladder Cancer....  The doctors believe they got all the cancer!  Praise the Lord!  He still has a long road, and the family needs prayers!!  Tonight, though I celebrate the fact that even cancer is No Match for THE LIVING GOD!    Continue to pray with me please!

God IS Able!

So you know how I just posted a couple days ago, about how great my life is?  Well it still is but yesterday I received the sad news that my 2 best friends who are sisters, just found out their dad has cancer...  I love this family so much!  My heart has ached beyond words, as I have prayed, and wept on and off for the last 24 hours.  As most of you know, cancer is not a stranger to my family, and probably isn't to many of you.  I've blogged a lot about my mom's journey battling cancer, and yet little on my feelings about it.  I can only write as a loved one of a cancer survivor, and that is different from being a cancer survivor....  I suppose I feel the need to share some thoughts that are all my own  Every person deals with cancer differently.  First, for there was the numbing shock each time.  The self protective strong shell, followed by  the sudden tidal wave of emotion that hits when you are in a room by yourself.  It is tempting to think that somehow the world will somehow stop when a love one has cancer, but the world just keeps moving, but part of you is stopped....    Keeping busy is essential  .  Otherwise your mind can't rest.  Prayer is vital!  Friends are imperative   Things I held on too, were God does not sleep during the storm!  He sees, and He cares!   Mark chapter 4 1 Peter 5:7 Prov. 3:6  

Remembering that others have faced such things, and seeking them out helped....  Accepting help when needed, and completing tasks.  Crying out to God, not with words, but with my heart!    Finding a positive escape...  

Last and most important- Asking God to empower you, and help you love and trust him, through it all!  Remembering He sees your soul, and He's bigger!  He is able to rescue, no matter the trial whether it is cancer, or something else.  Even with the questions, it doesn't change his nature!  He is in the big picture, and the "small" details!  I don't believe God views things in large and proportions like we do, because to him all things are both big and small.  Verses that help me understand.  1 Peter 4:12 "  .   So while I hate cancer, and I hate that has affected so many people, I know God is able!  God's words says He knows how to rescue the Godly!  2 Peter 2:9  Please pray for my friends the Hand family! 

New International Version (©1984) Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.

Stretched and BLESSED!

Hi bloggers:

Several times I have written posts only to delete these later...  A   year ago today, I  was traveling to a women's conference, and little did I know that a week later I would be invited to go to Michael W, Smith's  home....  My mom was in remission for the second time, and life was lovely.  READ about it Here and also Here Time of my Life  Today my friends went to the conference again this year,and I wish for them a wonderful time.  I cannot begin to tell you all the ways God has blessed and stretched my family and  I the last 3 months.  God has provided Physically, monetarily and emotionally for all of us!  Even when it seemed things were unraveling, God''s people have stepped up and the riches of God's grace has sustained in every way.  It has not always been pretty, but it's been true, and it has been real.  People from our church have been remarkable!  Every night when needed meals have been brought to us!  God has been faithful, granting his peace and Presence at each turn.  I'm sorry for my lengthy periods of silence.  There were times a few weeks ago, when I was fearful and frustrated that mom kept having setbacks  To see her now, you would never imagine how sick she was!  She has shown amazing courage.  I"m getting my mom back!  As I think, I mentioned in earlier post doctors seem very Optimistic about a long term recovery.  The cancerous tumor is gone, and I praise the Lord for more time to enjoy her!  I am sad for a friend who found out there is nothing more that can be done medically, for her mom who has fought long and hard battling cancer.  My heart aches for her, as I know we are no more deserving than she and her family.  I see suffering and hurt everywhere through violence or natural disaster, and sickness.  To be honest, I still cannot fathom what would happen, if my plea for mom's healing from God was No but on some level, I know that as long as I have eternal hope in Jesus, I really can face whatever comes.  Would I need the Lord to carry me, and grant me the will to keep going, yeah you better believe it!  I KNOW MY GOD IS ABLE!  I KNOW I HAVE A HOPE BEYOND THIS LIFE!  I KNOW THAT HE IS FAITHFUL AND HE CAN HANDLE ME, THROUGH THE GOOD AND BAD. ONE OF THE AMAZING TRUTHS ABOUT GOD IS HE DOES NOT ABANDON HIS OWN!  What do you know about God that gets you through the impossible?  

TO BE CONTINUED!

Hello Bloggers:

Where I live it has been like spring time this week and I just love it!    To be honest, I have not felt much like writing or blogging because I've been having pain in my good hand and neck.  Plus, I have a little more on my plate to arrange my own care while mom both prepares and recovers from surgery.  The last couple days have been stressful, and I've felt like i'm carrying the weight of the entire world upon my shoulders.  I won't make mom's surgery or cancer the primary focus of this post, but her surgery is Feb. 23rd at 12:30.  I am learning that my pride shows up in the illusions of control.  When illness comes to a family member, and I guess even more to the person who has the illness, the false sense of control we think we have is shattered!  The world does not stop, because trials come, but with cancer, as with many other crises in life, there is a robbing of security, no matter how False it is, that does not in most cases return.  Since it is false, in so many ways it is a positive, for Christians to discover when we are trusting in false security, instead of Christ who is our security. It is hard to even realize that you are trusting in things like health or __ fill in the blank, until suddenly that thing is shattered.  Today, I found out that a lady who helped me get plugged in to Choices, where I volunteer died yesterday of Pancreatic cancer.  If she had promoted the ministry, and invited a Choices staff member to our church.  I would have missed out.  One of the topics I had on my list was Romans 4.  I have to stop this post in the middle, as life calls me but I will continue my thoughts next post...  Sorry 

Blogging Friends!

Hello Blogging Friends:

Sorry I have been away for a bit....On January 26th 2011 I posted about a possible crisis in our familyFIND HERE.  What I could not tell you at the time, was confirmed today.  My mom has a small cancerous  tumor... For those of you who have followed my Blog for Awhile know that this is my mom's 4th time battling cancer.  Surgery has not been setup yet.   She will be looking at a minimum of a 4 to 6 week recovery.  Please keep her and us in your prayers.  We are hopeful and optmistic.  I know God will be, and is faithful!  There is such sweet peace in Jesus!  I will try to get back to "normal" regularly posting asap.  

Two Little Words that mean so much more!

Hi All:

   Hope all is well with you!  My mom returned to work this week after a cancer free summer, the first one she has had in 2 years!!!!!!!!!  Exhaling with joy.  One year Ago today, I sat in ICU waiting room waiting  to see her..  Life was at the time so uncertain.    Thank you Lord, and thank you fellow bloggers for your prayers!  I sat here wondering what on earth to blog asbout, and the reality of this date hit me.  Suddenly my heart is overwhemled with thankfulness!  I honestly didn't know last year at this time, if my mom be here in 2010,, and now here she is thriving!  Though it seems to say so little.  I just wanted to say Thank you Lord, for taking care me and mom & thank you friends for your encouragement!

Mom's Health Update/June 8th... Here we go again...But I will Praise YOU!

Note from T.J. This is my mom's health update, not the ideal we hoped for, but we praise the Lord at all times....   Thank you for your prayers we need them!  I know it could be far worse, but I am disappointed. T.J.

In March I told you that I would have a follow up PET Scan within three months. Last Tue. (6-1-10) I had the PET Scan and I have been in waiting for the past 6 days for the results! The results were not what I had hoped for, but God knows what he is doing and so I will just continue to allow him to work through and within me to accomplish what he has planned. I still have a spot in the anal area and it has gotten bigger than it was three months ago. Dr. Lorenzo plans to put me to sleep on Monday (6-14-10) and make some deep cuts for some biopsies to see if there is cancer back in that area. I will not know the results of those biopsies for at least 5 days! Now the good news is that I will have time to read those 5 books on my bed side table that I have not had time to read in the past 6 months. Ha! The bad news is that if it is cancer then we will be looking at surgery again to remove the cancer. My hope is that it is not cancer, but looking at the past two summers it is a little hard to get my hopes too high on being in remission.




The PET Scan also shows a highlighted area in the jaw area again. This maybe nothing and it could be that the lymph nodes in that area are enlarged. Time will tell on this one! It is the same as last time so it is not bigger! I am suppose to see Dr. Johnson on Thurs. (6-17-10) and get his intake on all of this so I will have blood work and everything done at that time to see if it tells us anything also.



On June 2, 2008 I was diagnosed with cancer. It has been a very long road, but God has been with me all the way and I will continue to trust him to guide me. Psalm: 91:1-2 “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, “HE is my refuge and my fortress,” My God in whom I trust.” I again will ask for your prayers in the coming days as we go through the testing and the future of battling the beast I call “CANCER”! It seems too rare its ugly head up when you least expect it! God always places people and things in your life just when you need them. I had just begun to read a book called, “Count it All Joy” by Don Maiden, and it has already blessed me and helped me to remember that I will still continue to praise God in good and bad times. Love, Madeline Ellis

Mom's amazing Praise Report,,,,

God continues to amaze me with his Greatness and wonders! Here is my mom's latest Praise Report, if you know how bleak things seemed a week ago, then you know how awesome this is! I am so very thankful! Please praise God with me! Thank you for praying!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please keep doing so!
Here is the report!

T.J.

God has blessed me with more good news today and I just needed to share it with all you great prayer warriors and friends! I spent almost three hours at the ear, nose, and throat specialist today. I had a hearing test and I guess in about 10 to 15 years I may need a hearing aid! Ha! Truthfully I have lost some hearing over the years and I guess it was from all of that hard rock I listened to in the 70's and 80's! It also may be from the Faulkner side of the family which seems to have that problem as we age. It aint no fun to get old! Ha! The PET scan had shown an enlarged lymph node on the right side under my jaw area. Dr. Armstrong did a thorough exam of the area and then took a camera into my nose and throat area and discovered something that shocked both of us. I have had an abscessed cyst in my throat. He has given me an antibiotic and wants to see me back in 6 weeks to make sure it doesn't return. He also wants to see me again after my next Pep Scan to see if the area still shows up on the PET scan. I was very pleased with the report and give God the praise again for allowing this not to be cancer. I am so thankful to him that all of these reports seem to get better each time we see a doctor. The rest of the reports will be back on March the 19, and I will update you then. I just want to thank you for all of the prayers that you have lifted up on my behalf and also for all the cards, email, and phone calls. I am so blessed to have so many people who care and pray for me daily. Thank you!! Love, Madeline

Good News!

Hi,

Thank you for your prayers and interest in my mom! I wanted to you give you some wonderful news! My mom's Liver scan came back clear no cancer in the liver! She is having tests run on other suspious areas, but no news yet. Thanks for your prayers! This is a much better week than last. I will try to post something fun soon!

Setback with Mom, but she is improving!

Hi EVERYONE;
August 26th
This is T.J. Mom had to return to the hosptial last night, because she was very sick, and was having a high fever. It turns out she has an infection in the lymph nodes of the incesion in her leg, but she does not have feeling there, so she did not know. They drained a lot of fluid today, and she sounds better today. They are giving her lots of meds. Sorry I have not updated sooner, but I've had a bug, and been out of it. Thanks for your prayers!

T.J. M'S daughter
Friday, August 28, 2009 3:27 PM, EDT


Hello,

Mom came home from the hospital late last night She is doing very well. She is eating well, and up and moving about though this takes great effort. She wanted me to tell you that she already has fluid building up, one of the doctors said they may have to go back in surgically to insert a tube, in order for the fluid to drain as it should. They are going to try and hold off on that until next Friday to see if this will be needed, because that is when her next appointment is. It may have to be done sooner, if the fluid does not drain properly. It is my understanding that too much fluid in her leg can cause infection, especially since she does not have feeling her upper leg, where they did surgery. So we would ask for your prayers in this matter, but this is a far more common problem than the previous ones she has endured. Mom and I have sat face to face today, and been able to chat which is such a gift from God! She is alert! Please don't misunderstand, she does tire easily, of course, but she at this point very improved and we praise God! I am hopeful this is a real turning point! Again, her appointment is Sept. 4Th. Thank you for your prayers and loving support!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so proud of our Mom!
T.J. on Madeline's behalf)


Hi Gang! I know you are probably ready for some posts that don't involve Mom's health, but since you all are praying, I still need to post these for awhile! thanks for bearing with me!

3 in 1 Rollercoaster update on mom!

Tuesday, August 18, 2009 6:49 PM, EDT

Hello family and friends!

This is not the update that I expected to be giving you today. I have finally been able to get in here with the help of a good friend to update this page. Mom went to the doctor today expecting to get her staples out but for the last couple of nights she has had low grade fever, chills, and a large amount of bleeding from her incision site in her abdomen. They did a CT scan and decided that it would be best for them to do exploratory surgery to find out the cause of the bleeding. The doctors took her back to surgery at 7 minutes after 6. I am told that the surgery will take 1 to 2 hours and then she will be in recovery. The doctors sayshe will be in the hospital for 3 to 5 days. It is possible that the bleeding could be caused by stitches being torn or coming out or it could be something else. This is why the surgery is so important, to find the true cause of the bleeding. Margaret and Mumzie are at the hospital right now. I have had a special friend stay with me and now my assistant is here and available until late in the evening. I may not be able to update again this evening but I can put my number below if you wish to call or you can wait and I will do my best to update first thing tomorrow. God has been faithful through this whole process and even now His grace is sustaining us. I know that you will be in steadfast prayer and for that we thank you.

T.J.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009 8:31 PM, EDT

hello
I just wanted to quickly update you to let you know that mom is through with surgery. when i talked to my aunt last she said that mom was in recovery. She also said that the doctor was pleased with the outcome and is glad they were able to catch it early. They believe that at least on of the stitches got infected this is really all i know at this point. thank you so much for your prayers please keep praying. We are thankful for the victory we just had.
Thanks,
T.j.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009 12:46 PM, EDT


Hi All:

I am sorry I am only now updating, but it's been a busy day already. Mom did well last night. She is pretty out of it today,because she was nauseated really bad, so they gave her finagrin. She has waked today with the PT. I do have more info for you on what was actually done last night. They repaired a stitch that popped out, and had infection, which they think happened from having to cough. The doctor has placed permeant stitches on the inside. She is on a liquid diet, but that should only be for today. She is antibiotcs. The best of today was that I got to talk to mom on the phone for a few minutes. I was at AAA yesterday when all this happened, so it was kinda a lot to take in all at once. I don't know what I would have done, if my friend Courtnie had not stayed with me, because there was not time or a way for me to get to the hospital. God took care of every detail. Thank you to each one of you for all you've done!


Thanks,
T.J.
Thursday, August 20, 2009 6:29 PM, EDT


Hi All:

Mom has been up today! I talked to her a little bit ago, and her voice is so much stronger! She requested Chicken & rice for supper. She is off of most of what meds they have had her on. She was on round the clock antibiotics yesterday, 5 bottles worth. Justin visited her for a good bit of time today. It is looking like she might come home tomorrow!!!!!!!! I have not seen her since Tuesday. God is teaching me a lot about faith right now, and shown me how much unbelief is in my heart, He has ministered to me in so many ways today, and I know it is because you've prayed! I look forward to the day when my mom can update for you herself, as I know it will be a blessing to you all! I must be a broken record, but thank you so much for your love and support!
T.J.

Thank you bloggers for your prayer! Sorry I have not posted all this sooner it has been crazy!!!!!!!!!!! GOD IS ON HIS THRONE!!!!!!!