if,Mother’s Day hurts,your heart,.thats ok.

I know so many of you who dread at least two holidays in the year.  Some of you dread both Mother's and or Father's Day nearly every year because you either long to be a parent, and that dream remains unfulfilled, or you lost children or parents you'll never get back, at least not the way you did before.  I wish I could look in the eyes of your soul, and tell you how truly sorry I am for the sorrow these two days in the calendar year bring to you, whether it is because of death, divorce, infertility, or an estranged relationship with those you love. It could be all or none of these reasons that leave you feeling left out, and forgotten in these holidays  Let's just say what we are thinking, but aren't brave enough to say it, because we know the looks will get from onlookers. It isn't right or fair you have to deal with the ache in your heart this year or other years passed by but the truth is life isn't fair and isn't right.  Sometimes, it is just as my nine-year-old cousin says, "life is life" and you have to deal.  Our culture is uncomfortable with the harsh realities of life, and so we do whatever is needed to dull the hurt and discomfort we feel.  We attempt to numb sorrow, with whatever works.  Sometimes it is social media, though that rarely is helpful because it is like a megaphone in your ears and a dagger in your heart.  Sometimes, it is eating the Whole bag of brownie brittle I may or may not have done this.  Sometimes, it is more dangerous, like,self medacating wit( a substance of one kind or another
 This is not a post where I'm going say you are not coping well or doing it or you should do this instead.  I simply want to tell you God is there to meet you in your pain, even you don't believe He is.  I know I can't believe this for you any more than you can convince me to believe it.  All I can do is tell you what promise I'm clinging to and maybe just knowing someone cares will help whether you believe it or not.   "But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me." 2 Cor. 12:9-10 Do you feel weak?  Do you ever wonder if God's grace is sufficient for this weekend much less your life and future?  Let me tell you are not alone as you wonder, but as you wonder, the promise is still true,   A friend said to me today, I'm praying for you this weekend, it took me a minute to consider what she meant, as life gets us busy doing so that we don't have time to connect with the void that is as apparent as a neon sign.  I appreciate it as most would think it has been a few years now, I'm sure she is used to it.   I'm not used to it, and in some ways I hope I never am, because to be accustomed to the void is to miss the beauty of entering into ministry.  One of my new tradtions in the last few years has been to give my grandmother flowers.  I know she has a daughter she adores and that daughter would and has done everything for her.  That still does does not change the fact that she lost one daughter, and we lost our mother. My Aunt lost her sister, and the list goes on. It.feels like something that would makei my mom smile, even though the flowers might not be the most elaborate.
A word to those celbrating this weekend, never apologize or think you need to feel guilty for celbrating and vauling your parent,or your child this is good, healthy and right to do.  All of us will be without a parent, parents, or a child some day, and so savor the moments you have.  If your realtionship is messy or complcated make peace with it again.  That might mean accepting and forgiving a parent who never was able to give you what you hoped for.  What  ever you need to do to to do to begin to heal, you can start now. If you,need to rest or cry or write a letter, or make a phone call do what you neeed to do.  If you need to pray at home one sunday, out of the year on purpose so be it.  By the way i am not suggesting that you do that, so dont have your Pastor write me to tell me how wrong I am.  Im simply saying especally on these hoildays, God gives new mercies and even special ones,  Whatever you do, it will go a long way torward healing if you reach out to support someone    In need.  I have seen this so many times Whatever we feel this weekend or other days in our,lives,  We have to know God’s grace can and does sustain us not just in minds, but in our hearts and,that is something.only God gives.