I strive to be at least two things. One a good listener, Two, a person of prayer, When mom got very sick, my prayers were short and simple. Sometimes all I could do was pray a few words at time. Secretly at the time, this went on for several months, I would do my best to go through the motions knowing others were holding up in prayer. It is not easy being known as "the prayer warrior" in most of your circles . Don't get me wrong it is one of the greatest privileges in life is to pray for others.. What an honor that others allow you the joy of sharing their burdens and counting on you to pray. What a great joy it is to trust God and watch Him act. In spite of this though I continue to wrestle in prayer these days. It does not seem to come as natural as I might have once thought it to be. Some days it is hard to focus and my mind wanders. Other times it seems like I just don't know how to express myself. I know there is a shock huh? There are a few lessons I've learned recently, or am continuing to learn. I'd like to share to share a few, in case it could help someone.
Prayer is hard no matter who you are... No one person is a master at the Practice of prayer. I know you like me, must have had those moments where you thought if I could pray like that guy, It would be so much better. Trust me he struggles just like you, and if he doesn't now he will some day.Romans 8:26
Humans have made prayer into a formula, instead of a two way grand fellowship between God and man . We create patterns in prayer, many of which are good. We need to include elements like Thanksgiving and confession see Ps. 100 and Psalm 51, but there are seasons when we should allow our hearts to flow freely as we would, when we have a conversation with someone else. This one is hard for me. As I am super structured and this also how many of us are taught. I always laugh when I think of how my grandfather would jokingly whisper to me Rubadubdub thank you for the grub, before his actual heartfelt dinner blessing. I truly believe God created enjoyment and He values humor. No one has taught me more about incorporating laughter in prayer than Jennifer Hand. Sometimes we stress so much about how to talk to God. Recently. I was upset, because I just could not pray. In a rather helpless moment of attempting to ask God what was wrong with me, it seemed God was impressing upon me the reality that wasn't a time for me to speak words, but to invite God to speak to my spirit. I would never have spoken the special words God gave to me, to myself. If you are struggling to pray, It could be because it is a time God is desiring to speak to you. Prayer is mostly hard, because we make it hard. A friend reminded me recently, We can be more ourselves with God, than anyone. This is because He more than anyone else: knows who we really are! Do you ever wonder if you can do the prayer thing? Well, two years ago, I might have shrugged my shoulders, and arrogantly thought to some degree it is not that hard. Of course, that was before Prayer became the hardest battle I'd ever fight! I'm just starting to come out of the driest and most difficult prayer season I've ever had in my Christian life to date. I can also tell you if that is where you are, it is okay. You are okay. God is still there. Don't quit, but give yourself grace! God is patient... Keep going, It will be worth the struggle.
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