The Blogger Herself

The Blogger Herself

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Leaving the sameness of life can be good sometimes...

Hello Bloggers:

         My last post I expressed my struggle with coming to terms with my emotions, and still choosing faith.  I am doing much better!  Thank you for your prayers these have made an amazing difference!  I don't want to focus too much on my struggles tonight, but instead on the faithfulness of God.  I took a 48 hour sabbatical from all things electronic other than my chair and TV, and guess what it was blissful!  I got out of my own head, and as we traveled I sat in the quiet, and I know people back here in Chattanooga were praying for me, and some not in Chattanooga too.  Perhaps it was the huge waterfalls I watched in a  small town park or the amazing cheeseburger on the grill that I ate which tasted like a celebration in month.  Was it the sound of unexpected laughter or the overload of tasty goodies that turned my sadness into surprising joy.  It was all of these, but it was something else too.  It was the chance to get away from myself and the sameness of life.  The opportunity to forget about life back here.  To forget about my bad habits or life's choices, or comparing my life to that of people my own age.  It was the ability to forget all things waiting for me back here, and to confess my sins and be refreshed and renewed.  It was the reality that I heard my mom laugh harder this weekend than she has in a long time.    It was the gift of counting my blessings, and for a moment knowing there were too many to even count.  I heard a sermon by Charles Stanley today, and the verse was Ps. 23:1 The Lord is my Shepherd I shall not want"  To be honest, that isn't on my top ten of Bible verses, but as I heard it half asleep, I was reminded God has blessed my life with an abundance of great things.  I don't remember a thing in the sermon, but I do know I had a change of prospective.  It isn't as if God is unaware of the longing of my heart, he is.   He knows that with each time I see the groom kiss the bride, or  another one of my friends hug their own child, through the joy there are days when my  heart is aching d wishing it was me.  But then there's that whisper that reminds that life isn't really about me, and what I'm looking isn't really most of all, isn't to be a wife or a mom, or a student, but instead to fulfill a purpose higher and greater than I myself could ever accomplish, and secondly to be whole, in so much as a person can be whole this side of heaven.  Maybe in fact, wholeness is not even something I should aim for upon this earth because perhaps maybe it is my own self-centered pursuit of becoming whole that causes me to miss the fact Jesus is my hope, Jesus is the one I am to pursue, and if wholeness is something to be obtained it will come from the one through whom all things come Jesus!  These are reflections and things I'm pondering.  As always your input is welcomed and valued, but as you ponder, take a lesson from me which I've neglected.  Don't forget to seek God's gift of joy in simplicity and strive to be thankful in all things!
Seeking the Higher things,  Fun Pictures of Family reunion weekend below!

Mom and I at Cumberland falls in Kentucky!

Family "Talent brings whole new meaning to the word talent.

They are actually dancing to MJ's "Billy Jean"