Thank you to those who serve

IMAGE FROM WWW.SIGNSTOR.COM

did not write this but it sincerely conveys my heart for our millitary! It was written by Jamie @ TO WRITE LOVE ON HER ARMS WHICH is a non profit. You can look them up on Facebook or Twitter. Hope you all have a nice Memorial Day, may we make a greater effort to REMEMBER!

Please remember the ones who can't forget, the soldiers forever trying to get home, trying to let go, to be okay...

To soldiers and to the friends and family of soldiers, we pause to acknowledge you today, to say that you matter. The things you've seen, the things you've lost, the battles that you fight, the dreams that steal your sleep - may we never call them small.

And we apologize today, for the ways that we forget, for the ways that we are selfish, for our lack of understanding. Perhaps the ones who've never been there, we can't begin to comprehend words like "war" and "fight" and "home." We don't know what they weigh and what they cost.

To the ones who fought for peace and freedom, we pray those things for you. We pray rest and hope and healing, and innocence again. We pray for people who will listen and the strength in you to speak. May other people know you, walk with you in the questions and recovery. May you get the help you need, the help that you deserve.

Today, we say that we see you, and not only as a soldier but also as a person. Someone not unlike us. You are significant. You are not forgotten.

Finally, humbly, thank you.

Peace to you today.
Jamie

Half Full Friday May 28

Started by www.Lifeaseyeseeit.com AKA EYEGIRL.
I am JOY FILLED because I've had a good week!
I am JOY FILLED because this week, I've been content
I Am Joy Filled because I got three unexpected gifts.
I am Joy Filled because I have rediscovered the joy of laughter!
I am Joy Filled, because my brother and I spoke today.
I am Joy Filled that on Tuesday I got a hug from my 4 year old cousin Jocelyn
I AM JOY FILLED BECAUSE Molly and I @ www.aforeignland.blogspot.com had lunch today after months of trying lol.

To Love, not To Change

Image is from http://www.sodahead.com/

Before I post this you may find yourself asking haven't you written on this topic before. Yep I have.... Probably more than once... I think this will be a bit of a different angle than before. I realized today that I don't have the power to change people, in fact, I don't even have the power to change myself. I realized today that I am quick to determine how I wish others would change, instead of just asking God to help me love them just the way they are. Sure I want others to love me despite my imperfections,but how willing am I to love others despite theirs. A trait that bugs me in others is impatience. I guess because I learned early in life that you cannot have everything you want in life how or when you want it, I just expect that this is also a no brainier for others too. I am use to waiting on public transport. I'm use to having to wait on someone to bathe me or feed me or fix me a drink. I'm probably one of the last people to complain about a waiter taking too long, I guess that is because it bothers me when people become upset with me for taking longer to do a task, and then I become upset with myself. My point is I need to better about loving others who are different than me. I need to be better about loving people who say whatever comes into their minds. I need to love and appreciate people who are reserved, instead of asking them to be someone other than who God made them to be. I'm glad that there are people who are different than me, because I am sometimes not assertive enough to get the job done. I am often defensive when it comes to criticism. I tend to deal with most situations relationally instead of concretely, which causes problems with people who are the polar opposite of me. I sometimes find it hard to love people who are very outspoken.
Sometimes people, need to change, sometimes I need to change, but we need God to teach us to love others for who they are, and leave the changing up to him, and the Holy Spirit. I am less paieint with peoples reactions than I'm with situations. That's what I sense the Lord telling me today. Stop trying to change ____ just love _ right where they are, the same way I have loved you! I'm thankful God is showing me that He does love me where I am, and that He can empower me to love others his way!
Desiring the higher things,
Oh please keep my mom in your prayers for a clear PET Scan on June 1st. Thanks so much!

Half Full Friday!

I believe that a lot of my happiness is determined by my attitude about the things that happen to me. So, I am deciding to see the glass as half full, instead of half empty. I am choosing to concentrate on the positives, instead of dwelling on the negatives. My Half Full Friday posts are a way to do just that. They are a list of the things in my life that have brought me happiness over the past week.
"Every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day." ~ Author Unknown
I'm determined to find the something good in every day. Thank you WWW.lifeaseyeseeit.com

Are you?
For the next week, I challenge you to keep a list of at least one thing that brought you happiness note I use the term joy filled instead of happiness just a personal pref. each day. On Friday, write your own Half Full Friday post and return to Life As Eye See It to link your post and to see what other bloggers found happiness in during the past week.

Don't forget to grab a Half Full Friday Banner or Button for your blog post if you are going to join in:

I am joy filled because…

I felt better on Monday than I did on Sunday, and got to enjoy a Mexican dinner

I enjoyed the "Good Wife!

I am having lunch with Molly next week.

I got a call from my best friend last night, and lovely dinner with my mom.

I got a hug!

I have learned to face some types of conflict, instead of running from it.

I got a free lunch yesterday.

I am off antibiotics.

Ladies Only! Men Beware!

Hello!

Well what a wild thing life is... I just need to have some girl talk with my female blogger. Sunday morning I woke up a true hormonal mess! By Sunday night I could not sleep, total mind racing episode tears, you name it I had it! Cold sweats and all . Some women have idea what I'm talking about, but I hope someone out there knows. Later in the week, a former caregiver, all but chewed me out on Facebook publicly. All this happened this week already, and there has been a RARE church conflict on Facebook. But there is a bright side always! God is not just not just in the big stuff, He is in the "small stuff too. I'm glad that unlike people God is so slow to anger, and abounding in real love! Romans 8:38-39 Check it out! I'm excited about my new blog followers. Don't let this post scare you off!

T.J.'sTV Plug

http://www.cbs.com/primetime/the_good_wife/video/?pid=bRSypLw_jhqbGlnsZVqJVUcrjCpdgAKv&nrd=1

I cannot help it I love this show.... It is the only show watch regular during the week I watch during the week, either On Demand. Totally worth an hour! Check it out!

You Gotta Deal with it!

Image from Google images... http://www.afrogeekchic.wordpress.com













Whether we Christians like to admit it or not, there is a level of truth to the above phrase. Please hear me- I will be the first to admit that THERE IS EVIL in the world, and the sources of that evil are the three S''s Sin, Satan and Self. I might even be inclined to change the above phrase to read, "The path to evil often begins with apathy. Don't believe me? Let that sink in for a minute. I bet more people become atheists through apathy than most any other reason. It is eaier, in some ways to believe in nothing, than it is to believe in an ALL POWERFUL GOD, because one calls you to invest nothing, while the other calls you to invest everything! Sure maybe it happens for other reasons, but it does not happen without Apathy. You suffer, you become hurt or mad, before you know it that hurt, becomes apathy, and finally that apathy becomes deeply rooted bitterness unless it dealt with. It was not just evil that led to the Holocaust it was the belief that nothing could be done so why try or the "that's their problem, not mine" motto. What does Apathy look like? It depends on the person. For you apathy maybe cutting in line at the grocery, or knowing you should apologize, but not caring enough to say it.
I'll confess where it has shown up inside me lately. One Idolatry, and second prayerlessness. What I just put out there ,for all the world to see isn't just embarrassing, it is dangerous, because of the gifts God has entrusted to me. People would likely not be surprised by the idols of my own soul, at least I don't think they would, but one thing a prayer warrior is never expected to battle is the temptation of prayerlessness. I'm not saying that all these years I've faked a calling or commitment to prayer, it isn't in me to do that, I fear the Lord far too much to be willfully phony in that way, in seasons past, I've been called to spend both short and long periods of time earnestly pleading with God on behalf of others. I say this not with a boastful motive, but rather to provide evidence of my apathy in recent "Seasons" Last summer my mom's cancer returned, when I sure it was a permanent healing from God. Six months later, it returned as you know, what you may not know, is that my faith isn't apparently as strong as I thought it was, and since then I have been baffled with questions in my heart and mind, as to why it returned again. She is currently in remission, and yes I do give God all credit and honor for that. It has brought all sorts of questions about intercessory prayer I've never faced before like can we mere humans influence God through prayer? The answer to that question is one that makes my brain and my heart, hurt and still I have seen God perform wonders, and I know those wonders have come about through this amazing thing I've loved for so long called prayer. Jesus made prayer possible, so I must trust even when I don't understand it So to bring this back around, the Bible uses another word for apathy. It is Lukewarm. So I must be willing to not settle for apathy, but rather Christ Centered Excellency! These two issues have also began to effect my eagerness in writing prayer letters for CHOICES. I didn't even realize it until the Lord and I untangled the matter this morning. So take it from me, if there is any matter of apathy in your walk with God, don't let it sit there, face it, even if it takes days, or weeks, or months, to get back on the path again. Make the effort, whatever it takes because apathy, is no place for one of God's Children! Rev.3:16 "So, because you are lukewarm-neither hot nor cold-I am about to spit you out of my mouth."
Desiring the higher things...

That's MY MOM!

No, you are not imagining things, you have seen this pic before! It was from my Women of Joy post! It was the only recent picture of mom I could find to post. Happy Mother's day to all you mom's out there! Let me tell you a little about one of my favorite people. My mom! My mom and I have and are sharing an amazing journey called life. She is a woman of amazing strength. She is an amazing artist, A hard worker, a passionate teacher, A woman who is tough as nails, dependable, the life of any party. She lives her life by the motto "ACTIONS speaks LOUDER THAN WORDS. SHE IS GIVING. She will offer her time and talents to whoever needs them. She can find joy in almost anything. She rarely complains, but isn't fake, and does not sugar coat things. Her humor is totally contagious. She could dwell on how her life has difficult, but instead she lives life in the moment without excuses. She has a real desire to bless others, but is humble, never comfortable being the center of attention, unless it is for the sake of honoring another person. She is not afraid of looking stupid, as long it brings a smile. She loves crafts and secret projects. She loves to give people surprise gifts. She would do almost anything to show her children she loves them and has done so over and over! Some people might have allowed the challenges of single parenting cause them become to become bitter or self centered, but she never has. Through the last few years her faith in the Lord has grown and blossomed. There has never been a mother with more sacrificial love in her heart than mine. She is silly and fun! She has been a girl scout leader to physically challenged girls, hosted sleepovers, camp outs, pulled all nighters for school projects, attended numerous little league world series, games, given money when she didn't have much to spare. Sat in the rain to attend a concert that she had no desire to attend. She has traveled to a political rally for her daughter, sake when she had plenty of reasons not to. The list could go on forever, from being a prom driver to a 24 hour nurse. All of these things are only the beginning of why I am choosing to celebrate my mom today. "I thank my God as I think of her." Paraphrase of Phil. 1:3. If you mom is alive, and has blessed you in any way way at all, no matter how imperfect she might be celebrate her. If you have lost your mom, or do not have one who is involved in your life or who has treated you badly. I am so sorry, and I offer you heartfelt hugs and a prayer of comfort!.

Michael W. Smith Introduces Zach Wamp

This post is long overdue! I attended this event @ the Smith home and wanted to share this with you! I do not vote for just one part all the time, but if you live in TN, I would like to encourage you to make an imformed voting choice no matter who you choose. In fact, I would encourage anyone in Any state to make an informed choice!

Roll 4 Life 2010 Pics!

I was going to put my 1 one year old cousin Jack's pics on here, but mom deleted them, by mistake.... I have raised 750$ dollars so far thanks to some very generous people!

I took this pic! Can you tell? lol!

I don't like this pic, but it is the only one I had of me, by myself!

2010 Walk for Life! Go to http://www.choicesprcnow.org/ for more! Fundraiser for Choices PRC formely AAA Women Services.

GIFT OF GRACE! WHAT A WEEK!

Future TN Govenor/current TN CONGRESSMEN, ZACH WAMP!!!

Bo Davidson Actor on Bold & Beautiful/singer

Debbie Smith.... Wonderful lady.

Smitty and me!

I will explain how all this happened at some point, but for now I hope you enjoy what I wrote about my Cinderalla trip.

Some of you have kindly inquired about my trip to the Franklin TN for the Zach Wamp fundraiser at the home of Michael W. Smith and his wife Debbie. I still can't really believe it. I feel like it was a dream, but it wasn't it was real. We got there very early because we were not sure how to get my chair in. The gate opened right up. No pass code or anything. They live on a massive hill, a friend of theirs came to the van to say hello. Their 2 dogs’ one a beagle and another golden came to meet us. Copper and Kail. They also have a cat, but I didn't see her. We went up the big hill and through the bushes onto the side walk using ramps. We were not sure which entrance to take. Because there was a giant serving table in the path of one of the entrances. We waited not sure what to do, and I noticed a young girl who I still believe is Michael's youngest daughter Anna trying to get one of their dog's on a leash, but I didn't have the courage to ask her. A few minutes later an older man came over to us, and showed us a more level entrance. I had a hunch he was there Pastor because I had seen photos of him, but again I didn’t dare ask. We thanked him very much! We still weren’t sure if it was too early to go in, so we hesitated. Suddenly I noticed a figure at the door and I was sure my eyes were playing tricks on me. No, there he was dressed in a suit which I personally believe is out of his comfort. He came to the door, and said hey so glad you came, did you have any trouble getting in here? I flashed the best smile I could trying not to seem too eager He took my hand and said great to see you come on in! We went into the living room, and I knew his wife Debbie as soon as I saw. I thanked her for having us, and asked her it was okay if I hugged her, I know bold move, but I was overcome with respect for her. Some time later Kim Wamp came over to my friend Jerry, and he introduced us. She was polite and classy. CONGRESSMEN soon to be Governor Wamp soon followed. He was kind, and not at all stand offish. Jerry told him I volunteered with Choices and his face lit up, and he said something like that is wonderful, We Tennesseans are proud to defend the cause of all live aren’t we? The next thing I know he gave me a kiss on the forehand and check, I watched as some people got their fundraiser photos with Zach and Smitty next to the fireplace. I was not envious, at all, I was loving watching them move, and imagining what they said, and noticing little details about the house to be continued soon! In Part 2!
Zach Wamp Fundraiser Part 2…. . Also sorry so long! We didn’t eat anything at Smitty’s house. It wasn’t for lack of food. There was plenty of it! I was surprised by how calm I was. Remember I told you earlier that an older man showed us how to enter into the house, and how I said I thought He was their Pastor? He later introduced himself Don Finto I never mentioned that I knew he was their Pastor, but I told my friends Debbie and Jerry later. We met Harold and Lil Coker of Coker tires. I was thirsty, so mom got me a bottle of water. I guess I was expecting disani, and figured if I am a water snob they would be too. I guess not, since it was aquafina. Let me just tell you Zach Wamp’s son Weston is at least 4 years younger than me, but If I he didn’t have a lovely girlfriend I would so chase him down! Later, they asked everyone to move outside on the deck for the speech and performance. I got pretty close, and we waited and watch as people mingled a little more. I noticed that Michael seemed to move quickly as if he were almost running or pacing. I love there deck, I think from what I saw it was my favorite. There were photos of their family in every single room in every corner I saw. Smitty brought his Keyboard onto the deck, no one helped, like at a concert where he would have setup crew. Zach Wamp began his speech by thanking Michael and Debbie for hosting, but before that Pastor Don Finto led a prayer. Zach referred to Michael and Deb as the REAL DEAL, and I could not say it better! He then talked about how Monday had been a bittersweet, because of the rally, but bitter, because that same day he attended the funeral of a fallen Chattanooga Solider Jonathan Hall. His family has been long time supporters of Zach Wamp’s. I’ll attempt to post this soon. He then talked about how the US is a democratic republic. How our forefathers had every intention of government having a limited role in over lives, and they would roll over in their graves, if they could see the level of control and abuse there is now. He talked about education and how important it is that real education begin at home, how early reading needs to begin in early childhood education, and that the must be invested as well as effort early, and the program he wishes to implement as TN Governor. He talked about how he has the clearest vision for TN, and reminded us that the Bible says without vision my people will perish. He talked about how if everyone told one person about the vision, and then that person told their friends, then it is possible to make this vision/mission a reality. He talked about making TN a healthy state, thus lowering health costs as so much of what we spend on healthcare is preventable, with healthy living and education. He was humble, sincere, passionate and seemed to have an idea of the difficulty that Then Smitty sang a new song called welcome Home in memory of Jonathan Hall. It was about the angels singing when someone enters heaven. Then I guess you would say Zach Wamp’s campaign person Mark talked Smitty into singing friends, and then future governor Wamp asked him to sing one more song, and he sang a new song in honor of his wife Debbie. After that Mark can’t remember issued a real plea for further support of Zach Wamp, and they officially concluded. People were everywhere. Debbie Smith was asked by my friend Debbie Hightower, if she would have her picture taken with me, with my friend Jerry’s camera, she agreed. I apologized, and explained what an inspiration she and her husband had been to me over the years. She seemed pleased. Oh I forgot earlier in the night, Zach Wamp’s Photographer took a photo of me with Bold and Beautiful star Bo Davidson. Later, my friends asked Michael if he would be willing to take a picture with me, and he did. He seemed more stressed than the times I have seen before, but he still glowed with love and compassion. I loved having the photo taken, but I felt different this time. I thought about how weary he must often feel being in the spotlight all the time. People always wanting a piece of him, and I thought God it is only because of you he has made it, and is still standing. I thought about how blessed I am to have amazing friends like Debbie and Jerry and others. I thought about how much I love my mom, and how much I hope she knows how much she means to me. How amazing she is. I am amazed she would take me, all the while knowing she had to work the next day. I became overwhelmed with the reality of this gift God gave me, not just the trip, or going to the Smith’s house, or meeting Zach Wamp, but the gift of his grace. I did nothing to deserve this trip, or the life I have, but God has granted me His favor. I did nothing to deserve Salvation, but he gave the gift, I’ve spent a lot of my life, trying to be worthy of God’s love and grace, trying to perform for people, and I guess that why I’m so drawn to Smitty. He too seemed to be in bondage, for years based on his testimony, and then he was hit in the face with reality that God is his Abba Father and he is loved and fully accepted. I pray someday that reality would be real to me He has something I long for. Yes, we are both believers, but he knows who he is, and he knows to whom he belongs! It has freed him. It has freed him to forget himself and love others. You would think after 20 years as a Christian, I would know the same, but it is struggle for me. I am learning growing in grace, but I still have a long way to go. I’m so thankful God hasn’t given up on me. Okay, back to the last 2 stories. Zach Wamp came by, and my friend Debbie asked, if I could have my picture taken with him. He eagerly agreed. I told him I was delighted to get a picture with my next governor! He smiled kissed me on the check, and thanks to my amazing devoted we made our way back in the dark through the shrubs down the ramp, on to the sidewalk down the driveway. Very SPEAICAL THANKS TO JERRY AND DEBBIE HIGHTOWER, I AM BEYOND BELESSED TO HAVE FRIENDS LIKE YOU WITH SUCH LOVE IN YOUR HEARTS! I LOVE YOU ALL. THANK YOU MOM! YOU REALLY ARE THE BEST MOM IN THE WORLD! I WOULD STRONGLY ENCOURAGE YOU ALL TO http://www.zachwamp.com/ Those of you who know me well, know I love politics, and that I vote not based on parties, but on overall package, and personal convictions. If you have questions about that you can contact me, I will be honest as I can I’m still learning. Voting is your choice, and I would never ask anyone to vote for someone without searching for yourself, as it is your personal a right and responsibility. It is yours and yours alone, and no should or can take away your voice, that is the gift we have in America! If you made it this far thanks you for reading this lengthy epic fairytale.

Playing Dress Up!

Cousin Brady's 4th birthday Party! Pirate/Princess theme!

My dress was my high school prom dress 9 years ago. I will be out of town tomorrow, but will have very exciting news to share with you as soon as I get back! I can hardly wait to post for you!

Jesus IS ALIVE, AND SO AM I

Yes, that is me with Karen Kingsbury, an unexpected gift from God I sure don't deserve! Please pray for Steven Curtis Chapman, this man is hurting a great deal as the anniversary of the death of his daughter draws nearer

Mom and I @ Women of Joy out at lunch...

Jenn and I @ Women of Joy

I will try to post some video at some point, but it was taking far too long too upload. Yes, Michael W. was there! I'm going to post some thoughts I began early, but could not post them when I was trying to upload the video earlier.

Thoughts I began earlier:

I know you guys must think I have forsaken the blogging world, but rest assured I have not. I spent time reflecting over Easter about how if there were no cross there would be no empty tomb, and if no empty tomb then, there would be no Savior, and if there is no Savior then I/we have no hope. No hope of forgiveness, No hope of Life here or in heaven! Without Jesus death and Resurrection there is no victory. There is truly no hope at all! This past weekend I went to the Women of Joy conference in Serveille TN with my mom mom and some wonderful friends and I would like to share some of the memories with you all through photos In the mean time, you should know I've found a new love. I have discovered Ephesians. Yes, for crying out I've read it before, but it is as though my eyes are seeing it for the first time! I would encourage you to slowly and prayerfully read it some time. In Chapter 1 it lets us know we are adopted by God through Jesus Christ, and the total motivation behind this adoption is God's love for us! The purpose of this adoption is to bring praise to God's glory, We can never add anything to, or take away from God's glory, His glory does not change, but We can bring him praise! I think it is coolest thing to know that We can give the God of the whole universe something, we can give God praise! Then in Eph. 1:7 we know that through the blood of Christ, we are forgiven, are being forgiven and will be forgiven! Then, if you flip over to Chapter 2, the heading is Made Alive in Christ! Let me stop here, and offer a disclaimer. I will not debate issues of predestination, I"m wresting with these matters myself, and likely will for the rest of my natural life, so I am not allowing myself to get bogged by this concept, to the point that I miss the reality hope and wonder of the gospel message! In Chapter 2, God through Paul, explains that we were dead in sin, but I'm so glad there is a but... God because of his great love and mercy for us made us Alive in Christ! I don't know about you sometimes I don't react as one who has been made alive, and yet God says because you are mine, you are alive! YOU ARE ALIVE, BECAUSE JESUS IS ALIVE! My friend Jenn has this phrase "I'm coming Alive" I don't think that means we are to be "up all the time" but from my limited knowledge, we can live more in the reality of Jesus is alive, and know that because He is alive, we too can forever live, not just in heaven, but even now!

Easter Picture Story 2010- Spiritual reflections soon!

  First pic of all three of us in about 3 years!  Justin got hit with a softball yesterday, so that is the bump on his forehead.Cousin Brady 3Jocelyn 4My Aunt always sets the table so beautifully! Brady & Jackson-Brothers 3 years and 1 years

                                                     Adult Easter Hunt for couples.

Loved Her Still By T.J. Ellis

What happened to that girl?

That girl who thought she could change the world

That girl who believed nothing was out of reach

That girl who saw the best in the worst

I wish I knew where she was

Where are the fire in her eyes and the song in her heart?

Where is that girl who believed?

Where did her passion go was it swallowed in apathy?

That girl must have lost her way.

That girl pretended that all was just as it had always been.

The change was not instant it happened over time

Nothing would ever be the same again

She could not go back and undo what she did.

Her mind never let her forget.

She lived in a world of silent flashbacks.

If they knew her thoughts, they would disown her for sure

After all she wasn't pure.

They did not see the layers of anger and shame.

They thought she was smart, but she knew the truth.

She was not smart, but what she lacked in intelligence, she replaced with effort

One day she came off the pedestal, and fell to her knees.

It was there lonely and broken she found her King

She could hardly breathe.

She expected to be cast out of His sight.

She had failed her task

Instead He stood before her with love in His eyes.

His Arms open wide.

All her life she had wanted a love like this

No matter how stupid she thought she was, or how inferior she felt.

He loved her still!

 

Can You Count?

Hi,

First, thank you Beth & Dee for your compassionate responses. The Lord knows his plans for me, and He is worthy of my trust and praises!
The Lord is never late... I am counting a few of my TONS of blessings today! Want to come along?
1. God has healed my mom numerous times and provided for me!
2. I was able to sit in the sun today.
3. The Lord uses music to make me smile!
4. People pray for me often.
5.I have the most loyal friends.
6. I have a bed, and clean drinking water.
7. The Lord forgives me constantly.
8. I have a van with a lift
9. The Lord is teaching me new things
10. I have a nice morning caregiveer.
11 Macy is staying here, even though my brother is moving out.
12 Today is a pain free illness free day!
13. The weekend is here.
14. I am loved.
15. Crossing paths with old friends.
16 Fun time
17. Victory is mine.
18. Easter is coming.
19. Heaven awaits me.
20 The ability to laugh.


God cares... He cares about me, and he cares about you! He knows me, and He still accepts me! God covers me in righteousness! His eyes are on me, and His eyes are on you! The Lord knows how to rescuse me, and that is what he has done not only for me, but so many of his children! Every blessing comes from His hand!

Pulling hair out! Venting!

Hello,

Warning there is no telling what this post may be about. I have been trying to send an e-mail out to over 100 people for 2 hours for my volunteer work. My email provider refuses to send the message, because it says it contains too many contacts. The ironic thing is, that only one contact has been added since the last mailing. It is an urgent prayer request that one of the volunteers/former staff asked me to send out ASAP.

It is time for the Walk For Life fundraiser and I have no clue how to involve my church in this, because there so much happening in the spring. I have been trying to meet with one of our church staff since Feb about personal matters without any family involvement which totally makes little sense now that I'm posting about it on a public blog. The truth is there are aspects of CP I hate, and I hate myself for that. I don't hate everything about in fact not even most things, but one thing I hate is the lack of control and privacy I have in my life. I hate that someone else has to know when I have to go to the bathroom, and that I can't do that by myself, but instead in that respect I am less than a toddler. I hate that the people who care for me have more control over my body than I do. I don't like to focus on these things, because it is self centered. I am healthy and for now mom is well! I am going to devote an entire entry to the wonders God has done in my life and the life of my family. For now, Lord please have mercy on me, and allow me to lay aside all the yucky stuff inside me I don't like that I cannot be left in the house alone, because there is a slim possibilty that the house might catch on fire and I cannot get out on my own. Okay all better.... Thank you all for indulging me, and my temper tantrum.

Mom's amazing Praise Report,,,,

God continues to amaze me with his Greatness and wonders! Here is my mom's latest Praise Report, if you know how bleak things seemed a week ago, then you know how awesome this is! I am so very thankful! Please praise God with me! Thank you for praying!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please keep doing so!
Here is the report!

T.J.

God has blessed me with more good news today and I just needed to share it with all you great prayer warriors and friends! I spent almost three hours at the ear, nose, and throat specialist today. I had a hearing test and I guess in about 10 to 15 years I may need a hearing aid! Ha! Truthfully I have lost some hearing over the years and I guess it was from all of that hard rock I listened to in the 70's and 80's! It also may be from the Faulkner side of the family which seems to have that problem as we age. It aint no fun to get old! Ha! The PET scan had shown an enlarged lymph node on the right side under my jaw area. Dr. Armstrong did a thorough exam of the area and then took a camera into my nose and throat area and discovered something that shocked both of us. I have had an abscessed cyst in my throat. He has given me an antibiotic and wants to see me back in 6 weeks to make sure it doesn't return. He also wants to see me again after my next Pep Scan to see if the area still shows up on the PET scan. I was very pleased with the report and give God the praise again for allowing this not to be cancer. I am so thankful to him that all of these reports seem to get better each time we see a doctor. The rest of the reports will be back on March the 19, and I will update you then. I just want to thank you for all of the prayers that you have lifted up on my behalf and also for all the cards, email, and phone calls. I am so blessed to have so many people who care and pray for me daily. Thank you!! Love, Madeline

Don't miss the Sunsets!

Picture from Google images and Lodgingforvacations.com

I am home with the end of bronchitis... I feel fine, but if I talk for any period of time, I s start to cough like mad. I did not go to Choices today, but none of this is what I wish to share with you. The last few weeks, my life seems to be one roller coaster after another, and yesterday nearly every fear I have suppressed came roaring to the surface. It was not that something bad happened, in fact the potential for something good seems to be possible. Still all day yesterday, it seemed there was this dark cloud of fear and hopelessness around me. i went outside yesterday, and the breeze and the warmth of the sun, and this is what I sensed the Lord whisper into my soul! "Don't worry about tomorrow child." "Don't let the troubles of tomorrow, rob you of joy today." You would be right if you are now saying to yourself the Bible has always said this it is nothing new. I have heard it so many times, but the reality of that has brought condemnation to me not freedom. That is until yesterday... Yesterday was different, yesterday it was like a breath of fresh air. I have been so bogged down by the fear of what could be that I have missed the joy of what is. What is is that my mom is here with me. What is, is that at this moment my NEEDS are met. What is, is that, the only place my focus needs to be is upon the here and the now. What is is that Jesus has gone to prepare a place for me. There are few guarantees in this life, and that is the part that lately has shaken me. Sometimes isn't just a day at a time, sometimes it is one hour or one minute. As a person with a battle with anxiety there is nothing more bizarre or shocking to my system than living in the moment. I don't want to miss the joy of now, because of my fear of later. The Lord knows I cannot handle the what if of tomorrow, all I can take hold of and should take hold of is the what is of today! I don't want to miss the sunset moments, because there is a possibility of rain.

Popsicles, and Shades of Blue!

From Google Images....

FROM Google Images...

These are two of my favorite things right now. Edy's all fruit Popsicles. Last Friday after training at Choices, I came home, and slept for several hours, I had a sore throat and stuffy nose, but a few days later after some rest I was feeling so much better. I ate a few Edy's Popsicles that week. I was able to go to Choices on Thursday, and we very busy and very shorthanded. I have been doing better with the whole thing with mom, in fact been more at peace than I've been in a very long time from an emotional and spiritual standpoint. Now the last couple of days, I have had a bad dry cough, drainage and wheezing. I feel like such a wimp, it seems like my body just does not handle or get over things as fast, as other people. Here my mom is fighting her health issues far more serious, and she is working just the same. Anyway If you have dry mouth these Popsicles are wonderful! Also if you are a Karen Kingbury fan and have not yet read Shades of Blue, I'm a little more than a hundred pages in, and love it, but if you are a first time Kingbury reader, I suggest you not start with this book, but try the first 4 books in the Redemption Series. I'm glad God's Mercies are new each day! Lam. 3:23. I am starting with a new morning caregiver on Monday. I know this post may not be the most encouraging, but I have lots of insights to share when I'm up to it. It has been nice to see a few folks commenting lately, thanks for the encouragement. My mom has a pelvic Scan on Monday, possibly a biopsy, and will see the ear/nose/throat specialist on March 10Th.